Shift in Perspective

Satisfaction

2012-02-11T11:53:00.000-05:00

He is most glorified in us when we are most satisfied in Him. John Piper

This quote has intrigued me for years. I liked it with my head, but as with so many aspects of Christianity and Scripture, it has difficulty making it into my heart. The idea is great, but how does that happen. I had two conversations yesterday that helped shed some light on it for me.

I was talking with my friend Lisa yesterday, and she was talking about two interesting passages of Scripture. The first one: James 5:11 "We count those blessed who endured. You have heard of the endurance of Job and have seen the outcome of the Lord’s dealings, that the Lord is full of compassion and is merciful." Even after living through difficult times, we can still say that He is merciful & compassionate. And the second passage in conjunction with it is from Job, since the passage in James is making reference to Job: Job 42:5 "I have heard of You by the hearing of the ear; But now my eye sees You;" We both acknowledged that we knew the Lord pretty well before our unique trials, but as Job says here, "But now my eye sees You." We knew things with our heads, but now with our hearts, or "our eyes of faith" as she put it.

The second conversation was with Miles. I was just saying that I feel like God has taken me to new depths in relationship with Him. He asked "What has God taught you that makes you feel like that?" Strangely enough I wasn't exactly sure how to answer the question. He has given me peace like I've never experienced in the midst of trial (vs. after the trial when hindsight is 20/20). There is nothing like being at complete peace in the midst of seeming chaos. I have typically been able to see that after the trial, but not during the trial. But it is more than that . . . I trust Him. There are passages of Scripture that don't make "logical" sense, and yet, it doesn't matter to me. I know that He is in control. I know that He has a purpose. I know that His ways are far higher than my ways . . . Hence why He is God and not me :). Miles said, "Yes. As we grow, He shows us more of Him and not more of what to do!" That is the point of Christianity anyway . . . to know Him . . . to bring Him glory!

So I'm learning more and more of God, and less about what I am to be doing. Christianity isn't about "maintaining" my salvation. God did that; it is finished. It is about Him. I can rest because I trust Him implicity. I can trust, because He has opened my eyes of faith. It is a very satisfying place to be . . . and according to John Piper, it is where He is most glorified.

2011

2011-12-31T17:21:00.002-05:00

James 1: 2-3 Consider it all joy my brethren, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith proudces endurance.

This has been one of the most difficult years of my life, and I have no desire to relive it. I can honestly say though, that I wouldn't trade what I've learned for the world. At church, we have been studying James 1, and for the first time in many years, I've been going through a very difficult time while studying "Count it all joy . . . when you fall into various trials." I remember thinking, "Are you kidding God? I know You see what we are going through. You can't possibly want me to be joyful!" as I watched my dreams appear to go down the toilet.

I learned that God seems to prepare people for His service in the wilderness. Moses, John the Baptist, Jesus . . . they all spent time in the wilderness before they began their ministry. 2011 was my year in the wilderness. I'm not sure if my time in the wilderness is over or not, but I know one thing . . . He is all that I need. So when something difficult comes along, I want my response to be, "Okay God. You are about to do something really cool, and I can't wait to see what it is. Please give me the strength to see it through!"

I learned that life truly is about serving the Lord. Nothing is more important. My job, my health, my husband, my future . . . nothing. God is all that matters. Everything on this earth is temporary except what you accomplish for the Lord. God hasn't given me all the things on this earth that I desire (as I made reference to earlier "watched my dreams appear to go down the toilet"), but I'm more than content with what He has given me . . . His joy which is my strength (Nehemiah 8:10).

I didn't have any choice except to delight myself in Him. He didn't give me the earthly desires of my heart (at least not yet), but He has changed my desires to be what He desires. That is where the joy and contentment come from.

Psalm 37:4 Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.

So as the sun sets on 2011 and I wait for the sun to rise on 2012, I look forward to what the Lord has in store next year.

TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY

James 1

2011-12-11T12:00:00.001-05:00

We've been studying James 1 over the last few weeks, and I think this is the first time that I have been studying James 1 while going through a very difficult time. It has been extremely challenging. It is quite easy when things are going well to say, "Yes! We need to have joy in the midst of trial!" and quite another thing to do it.

Consider it all joy, my brethren, when you encounter various trials. (James 1:2). Yes! Another trial. Woohoo! Thanks God! But the passage doesn't stop there. . . . knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. (James 1:3-4). Focusing on the trial certainly doesn't bring joy at all, but focusing on the end result does. Enduring trial helps us to be better people. It makes us more like Christ, AND THAT IS WHAT IT IS ALL ABOUT. Focusing on how difficult things are will just depress us. Focusing on how God is getting the glory by us rejoicing in the fact that He loves us enough to refine us and use us to show God's grace . . . that is worth rejoicing about.

Blessed is a man who perseveres under trial; for once he has been approved, he will receive the crown of life which the Lord has promised to those who love Him. (James 1:12) If you are persevering under significant trial, you are blessed! Don't run away from God saying, "How dare You put me through this!" Trial is a gift from Him; an opportunity to trust Him in a new way. An opportunity to stop depending on yourself, and put all of yourself into His hands.

Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren. Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow. In the exercise of His will He brought us forth by the word of truth, so that we would be a kind of first fruits among His creatures. (James 1:16-18). Don't be deceived . . . God doesn't tempt you. Everything that He sends you is good and perfect, even if you don't like it. He doesn't change. You can always trust that He will do what He says He will do. He will never leave you. He will always give you good gifts. He will always love you. He will always do what is for your best. You can trust your life to Him. What a relief when it seems like life is slamming you around like a ping pong ball! You can trust all of your pain and your joys to Him. He brought us forth by truth because we are His most prized possessions! Trust Him.

I skipped some verses throughout this passage so that this wouldn't get too long . . . but this whole chapter has just been convicting me and convicting me. I have to trust Him with my life. All the things going in on in my life that I don't like . . . they are gifts from Him to make me more like Him. He has my best interest at heart. It is all about Him and His glory . . . not me. How blessed to know that God is giving me the chance to bring Him glory through my trial.

Thanks God for the opportunity. Increase my faith. Help me to reflect You accurately!

Gratefulness

2011-11-24T14:08:00.001-05:00

I have a new perspective on gratefulness this year. It has been an extremely difficult few months, and I honestly felt like I had very little to be thankful for. So when November began and I started listing the things I was grateful for each day on facebook, I very quickly ran out of things. I knew that was unacceptable, and I knew focusing on the Lord will bring gratefulness. I will have you know it works. There were many days that I had a lot of difficulty coming up with something to be thankful for. Like today, I spent several hours in the ER with my husband last night into this morning. They found nothing wrong, and yet the symptoms are continuing today. He feels so badly that we are spending Thanksgiving at home by ourselves. I am anxious watching him try to get his breathe, calm his racing heart down, and fight the nausea. It is a bit depressing as we sit here, and yet, we have so very much to be thankful. We don't have health, we aren't surrounded by family, etc, etc . . . I can focus here, or I can focus on the Lord.

Focusing on the Lord brings true joy, peace, and rest. He is the only source. As I look at the facts that He chose me, He loves me, He has our best in mind, He knows me better than I know myself, He heals, He provides, He gives strength and grace to sustain, etc. James tells us to rejoice in difficulty because it will make us complete. I have such a hard time being still, and allowing Him to be God. I am always trying to fix things! I don't have to! Even if He chose to take one of us Home . . . that is Heaven! Heaven is a perfect place without all of the sin and chaos of this broken and fallen world. He has given us everything we need. I need to always be looking solely on the face of Christ. Everything else causes frustration and anxiety.

God, help me to focus on your face today. Help me to sing Your praises. Help me to rest in Your promises. Thank you for saving me and claiming me as one of Your own. I'm a daughter of the King.

When Sinners Say "I Do"

2011-09-28T18:51:00.000-04:00

So my nephew and his fiance asked Miles and I before they got married for marriage advice and some books. We talked with them for awhile, and then they said that the best book they had read so far was When Sinners Say "I Do" by Dave Harvey. They gave us a copy of it, and it sat on my shelf of "books to read" for about a year. I really don't enjoy reading, but I always have high hopes that I will read more. With my background in psychology, I've read a huge number of books about marriage, so I figured this was just going to be another one.

Well, one day, I decided to pick it up and start reading. It was good from the start. Why was it good? Because it is biblical. I have read so many books about all kinds of topics that try to integrate psychology and Scripture, but psychology usually takes precedence. This book is biblical. It doesn't allow people to make excuses.

I'm not finished the book yet, but I just read a chapter about examining yourself in a conflict.
1. In humility, suspect yourself first.
2. In integrity, inspect yourself.
3. Admit that circumstances only reveal existing sin.
4. Focus on undeserved grace, not unmet needs.

We must always humbly and honestly suspect that our sin is present, and it is playing a role in the conflict. We are so quick to recognize our spouse's sin, but it takes a lot of humility and honesty to admit that we aren't being patient or we aren't being loving or we are being selfish, etc. Our sin (being impatient, unloving, and selfish) is already present; the heat of the conflict magnifies them.

These four points are all so important, and ignored in our society. Miles & I work hard at the first three. It was the last point that was most got my attention. I see it so much. Psychology encourages us to express our needs and be honest with people. The biggest problem with this, is that we don't know the difference between our needs and our desires. There is nothing wrong with wanting an affectionate touch from your spouse, and a godly spouse will try to do this. However, it is a desire, not a need. There is nothing wrong with wanting a kind word of encouragement, and a godly spouse will try to do this. Again, it is a desire, not a need. Instead of worrying about your "needs" that aren't being met, focus on giving grace . . . which by definition is undeserved and has been offered to you interminably.
Have you read James?
¹ What causes fights and quarrels among you? Don’t they come from your desires that battle within you? ² You desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You do not have because you do not ask God.(James 4:1-2)
It is our desires that cause quarrels among us, not our needs.

Have you read what Jesus teaches?
²⁷ “But to you who are listening I say: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, ²⁸ bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. ²⁹ If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. ³⁰ Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back. ³¹ Do to others as you would have them do to you.

³² “If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. ³³ And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. ³⁴ And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. ³⁵ But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. ³⁶ Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful. (Luke 6:27-36)

Divorce is often based on "irreconcilable differences", but if you read this passage . . . you are going to have a difficult time convincing God of that. He commands turning the other cheek if someone slaps you. He commands giving to people who take from you. He commands that you give to everyone who asks (even if you are constantly giving and not getting anything in return). This is a difficult passage, but it would save a lot of marriages.

So just some food for thought . . . are you inspecting yourself humbly and honestly? Are you aware of your sin? Are you extending grace to your spouse?

Testing Trust

2011-09-07T19:21:00.000-04:00

"Shall I accept good from God and not adversity?" Job 2:10

I've had a lot of trials throughout my short life, but I'm finding that I deal much better with acute problems than chronic problems . . . meaning . . . I can handle the problems where something happens, its over, and then I adjust my life to it. Like when my mom died. One day she is there, the next she isn't. There is nothing I could do to bring her back, so I adjust my life, and move on. I'm not saying it was easy, but it was something that I had to keep working at. I don't deal so well with the problems that are always present. Like Miles' health, we are in a constant state of trying to figure out what is the source of his health problems. If we had a diagnosis, then we could deal with the diagnosis, but living in a constant state of what is it? How can we treat it? When is he going to feel better? . . . is extremely stressful. In all reality, you deal with both types of problems the same way . . . ask God for strength, live in the light of His promises, and adjust to your new normal. But when I am constantly trying to solve the problem or fix it, I live in a constant state of discontent.

So I'm a fixer . . . and when I can't fix it, I have to wait on the Lord. I don't like it, not one little bit. It should be easier and less stressful when I let the Lord take care of it. There is no need to worry about anything, because whatever I am worrying about will be taken care of at the appropriate time. It isn't on my time table though, and I can't deal with that. It attacks my pride of self-sufficiency. But that is exactly the point . . . I'm not self-sufficient . . . that is sin. I need to be God sufficient, because he is all I need. The day that I truly live out the promises that God's grace is sufficient for me, that He loves me, that when I am weak He is strong . . . that will be a beautiful day of rest and trust.

Maybe all He is trying to teach me is to trust Him. That is the heart of the Gospel anyway, right?

"When God tests you, it is a good time for you to test Him by putting His promises to the proof, and claiming from Him just as much as your trials have rendered necessary." (quoted from an excerpt of Streams in the Desert by A.B. Simpson)

Practicing the Presence of God

2011-07-20T11:12:00.000-04:00

I've been reading The Practice of the Presence of God: Brother Lawrence's Conversations and Letters. It has been an excellent read and extremely challenging. He was a cook in a monastery in the 1600s, and God taught Brother Lawrence how to practice His presence. He realized that everything should be about God and loving Him, so he carried out every task with loving God in mind. "Brother Lawrence emphasized that all physical and mental disciplines and exercises were useless, unless they served to arrive at the union with God by love. . . He found that the shortest way to go straight to God was by a continual exercise of love and doing all things for His sake." (http://www.practicegodspresence.com/brotherlawrence/practicegodspresence09.html)

So I've been challenged to practice God's presence all day. Brother Lawrence talks about the difficulties of doing so, especially starting out, but "Then, after a little care, we would find His love inwardly draw us to Him without any difficulty." (same source as above). I ask you all to pray for me as I begin this journey (and I encourage you all to join me on this journey) as I learn to love God in washing dishes, doing class prep, shopping, interacting with people, driving my car, and everything else that I do in a day.

Pray without ceasing. I Thessalonians 5:17

And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength. Mark 12:30

Prayer & Plans

2011-06-22T11:42:00.000-04:00

I am a planner. I have to have a plan or I feel lost. Marrying Miles has helped me learn to survive without one sometimes, but it is still my comfort zone to have a plan.

As I fight the fact that I have little control in my life and God has all the control, I am beginning to submit. I'm learning that I can make a plan and pray and pray and pray about that plan. HOWEVER, it is best to pray and pray and pray, then make a plan, and pray and pray and pray. I'm starting to get this, but it is such a struggle for me. But I know I need to submit to the ULTIMATE planner ... the One Who chose me before the foundations of the world and is using all things in my life for my good.

Praise Him with me . . . Pray to Him always with me.

Patriotism

2011-05-24T08:37:00.000-04:00

I used to be one of the most patriotic people I knew. My favorite skirt in middle school was made of material covered with the American flag. I had a tape of all American Anthems . . . and it was one of my favorites! My brother & my brother-in-law have both served in our military, and I'm so grateful for so many people who have given their lives for our freedom. I've visited many countries around the world that don't enjoy the freedoms we have, and I'm eternally grateful for our freedom . . . sort of . . . I've also found in other countries that they are more devoted to God because they don't enjoy the freedoms we have. They can't depend on their government to legislate morality or allow them to meet in church gatherings. They must depend on God. Our easy life doesn't enjoy sacrifice, and that is what Christianity is about.

But I was convicted of my patriotism one day a couple of years ago when speaking with a music pastor at a local church. He said the most frustrating days to lead "worship" in his church were the patriotic days. It wasn't because he didn't like the music or the cause, it was the response of the people. He said it was always the most passionate day of "worship" . . . unfortunately, the worship was of our country or the people who served our country . . . not God. Week in and week out, he would watch complacent people singing in the pews about how great God is with no emotion whatsoever . . . but he would pull out America the Beautiful, and people were moved to tears.

Again, please don't get me wrong, I am grateful for the USA . . . but do we worship it & our freedom more than God? Just something to think about . . .

Devastation & God's Glory

2011-05-04T17:59:00.000-04:00

It has been awhile since I posted last. Last time it was about tsunamis and earthquakes, today about tornadoes. The irony . . . Scripture is very clear that this these natural disasters will increase in the last days, and here we are.

part of our neighborhood

One of the tornadoes that destroyed the South last week came within one hundred yards of my house. Miles was at home when it hit, and our home was miraculously spared. The only effects we felt from the storm on our property: a branch about three inches in diameter is partially off a tree (and we are surrounded by trees); without power for about an hour; and without cable and internet for about a day. I even drove through quarter to golf-ball sized hail for fifteen minutes, and I don't have a single dent on my car. I felt almost guilty as we later drove through our neighborhood and then through the south side of town that was destroyed. But I have been given ample opportunity to give God glory . . . maybe that is why God was so gracious to us . . . Everytime someone asks about how we survived the storm, I start with, "only by the grace of God ... literally!"

part of the south side of our town

Today for some reason, I didn't start that way. I was describing how miraculously untouched we were, and the lady said to me, "My goodness, you must be in good standing with Someone up there." I then said, "Literally & Absolutely! If it wasn't for Him, we might have lost it all!" God deserves the glory from all of this.

I knew feeling guilty that we didn't have any damage wasn't right, but He has shown me how much He has done for me. We've been able to serve alot of people bkz we haven't been stuck at our own house trying to clean up. Some neighbors have used our fridge & freezer so their food didn't go bad. Some neighbors have used our shower bkz they have no hot water. We have donated & delivered food, organized donated items, listened to stories, cried with people, prayed for people and with people. Every time I have encountered someone who has experienced devastation, I feel so helpless and inadequate. I say to them, "I don't know what I can do for you, but I can pray. I will pray for you." Most of them said "thanks . . . that is the best thing you can do."

It has taken me some time to begin to wrap my brain around some of my own emotions surrounding this devastation, and I'm not there yet . . . but serving people and showing them the Savior is the best thing we can do.

Please keep praying for the victims of the 2nd deadliest tornado in US history, and Remember that He is still in control!

There's not a plant or flower below, but makes Thy glories known,

And clouds arise, and tempests blow, by order from Thy throne;

While all that borrows life from Thee is ever in Thy care;

And everywhere that we can be, Thou, God art present there.

(from I Sing the Mighty Power of God)

Earthquakes, Tsunamis, and God

2011-03-11T17:10:00.000-05:00

My favorite geographical location in all the world is a beach. I can, and have on many occasions, sat on the beach for hours just taking it all in. There is nothing like the beach. The sound of the water overpowers most everything else. I love to swim in the ocean. The feeling of freely swimming in something so powerful is amazing. It is like learning to trust God. He is awe-ful, but I am unafraid because I trust Him. The power of that water is awe inspiring. I love to just sit and watch the water come in and go out. If at any point, God decided to, He could intervene, and the tide wouldn't work like it does. The water would break loose, and completely devastate the earth. It happened in Genesis, and God promised to never completely destroy the earth again by flood. I can sit with confidence on the beach, in awe of the mighty power of God that He keeps restrained. It is His mercy that keeps the water where it is supposed to be.

This morning when I woke up hearing of an earthquake off the coast of Japan which caused a tsunami. One of those times that God did not keep the water restrained. My first concern was a friend in Guam. Then as I watched the videos on television, I sat in awe of the devastation. The pictures from a plane of this 30 foot wave that wasn't dying down like most waves do before they reach the shore. The wave hits the shore, and moves everything in its path like twigs in a river. I saw one scene of a tractor trailer just picked up and floating around like it was an inner tube. Dozens of cars and houses just picked up by the water and moved across the farmland like lava. I watched in silence for a long while. The fear that those people must be experiencing!

Yet the Lord brought me back to Who He is. He is the Almighty God. He reminded me of His mercy, of His holiness, of His love, of His wrath, of His protection. Psalm 46 began running through my mind:

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth should change and though the mountains slip into the heart of the sea; though its waters roar and foam, though the mountains quake at its swelling pride. Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth. (46:1-3, 10 NASB)

Who knows why God allowed this earthquake, tsunami, and devastation . . . but honestly we all deserve to die. It is His mercy that He extends to those of us unaffected. I hope that we are all reminded of God, His power, His Lordship, His holiness, and most of all His mercy.

My heart and prayers are with those suffering from the devastation. God, I pray that You would be with them, and they would search for You.

Praying in Faith

2011-03-09T10:54:00.000-05:00

So how do we pray in faith? I find it difficult to find the balance in praying in faith believing that God is going to do something and praying in faith that God's will is primary. I'm finding that I pray selfishly (and why not, selfishness has completely infiltrated my life . . . sorry for the sarcasm). Somewhere I went off the path . . .

I want to pray confidently that God will answer my prayer. I want to pray confidently that God is in control, but since I am not God (for which I am so grateful), I don't know His will.

I had an email conversation with a godly man about this topic to help me get my head back on straight, and here is what I've learned.
1. Praying in faith is not about having faith in the request coming to pass, but having faith in the God to whom we pray. TV preachers and pentecostals are constantly preaching the "name it & claim it" theology, and that is what this is. This actually looks alot like "I'll tell God what to do." I AM NOT GOD.
2. A big part of praying is for the pray-er to have his or her will conformed to the will of God. This is a big deal. I find that when I am just reflecting on what God's perspective might be on the situation that I am quickly given that truth. God wants me to see things from His perspective, and so when I ask, He gives that to me. The tough part is submitting to that contentedly.
3. The Bible is clear to let us know that we don't always get what we want. This was confusing to me, especially living down here in Church of God country where "Name it & Claim it" is a popular prayer. But when I think about it . . . again, I'm not God. He is. Parents know the difference between what their kids want and need. Sometimes parents give them things they just want, but many times they don't. The same is true with God. He knows what we need and what we just want, and sometimes He gives us what we want. But He always gives us what we need.
4. Prayer is not designed by God to be a means by which we twist His arm to get what we really need or want. Prayer is a means of communion with Him & our means of making our requests known to Him. This is where I have really missed the boat. Prayer is communion with God. It is a time to "be still and know that He is God" (Ps. 46). It is a time to get to know Him and learn how to hear Him.

God, help me to learn how to hear You better. Help me to learn to pray in faith well. I need to walk through life and listen closely.

Worship

2011-02-05T09:24:00.000-05:00

I think I've developed a skewed sense of worship. What is worship? Is it singing songs? Is it being in a church building singing with a group of people or reciting liturgical sayings? Is it running up and down the aisles laughing or yelling out to God? What is this thing we call worship? It is paying respect or reverence to God (in this case).

I've found that worship is not a natural occurrence for me or anyone else for that matter. It can become more natural for Christians, but it isn't a natural occurrence for us as humans. We would much rather whine & complain. I wonder if that is why it is referred to as a "sacrifice of praise"? I'm kidding a bit, but who knows.

Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise—the fruit of lips that openly profess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased. Hebrews 13:15-16

I've been reading The Prayer that Changes Everything (OMartian), and I've been learning alot about worship. It isn't singing with a bunch of people in a building, even though that is what most churches call it. It is giving respect and reverence to God. It is focused on God, not on me. Many of the so called "worship" songs sung in the building and on Christian radio are focused on me and my experience. But worship removes the focus from me, and forces me to focus on God.

Recently, I've been struggling to remember that God is good. That He really does have my best in mind. Unanswered prayers will naturally speaking elicit anger at God whether we admit it or not, unless you have learned to worship God in the midst of it. Unanswered prayers have elicited hopelessness in me, but I wasn't worshipping God in the midst of it. So God is teaching me to worship Him, and I'm using what He has showed me before to do so.

Do not conform to the pattern of this world (by whining & complaining), but be transformed by the renewing of your mind (I need to worship instead). Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—His good, pleasing and perfect will (His will is for us to praise Him). Romans 12:2 NIV

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. I Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV

So as I wonder why God isn't answering my prayers (because He really is answering them, just not how I want Him to answer them), and I get discouraged, I need to turn my face toward Him and praise Him for who He is and for His promises. Find things to praise Him for. Like the other night our HVAC went out. I could have complained about it being cold. Instead I was grateful for a person we didn't even know who offered us his kerosene heater. I was grateful that the electric bill wasn't going to be as high. I was grateful that we only had to replace parts of the HVAC, not the whole thing. Most importantly, I was grateful that He knows what I'm going through, and He is Jehovah Jireh, my provider . . . and I started worshipping.

“‘Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty,’ who was, and is, and is to come.” Revelation 4:8b NASB

You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being. Revelation 4:11 NASB

Will you love Jesus more?

2011-01-26T18:36:00.000-05:00

This is an old song by Phillips, Craig, and Dean, but I am always convicted by it. Here are the words to the first verse and chorus:

I feel quite sure if I did my best I could maybe impress you, with tender words and a harmony a clever rhyme or two. But if all I've done in the time we've shared is turn your eyes on me, then I've failed at what I've been called to do there's Someone else I want you to see.

Will you love Jesus more when we go our different ways? When this moment is a memory will you remember His face? Will you look back and realize you sensed His love more than you did before? I'd pray for nothing less than for you to love Jesus more.

As I sit here in my office reading hundreds of discussion board postings by my 201 students in my 6 classes, I am mesmerized by the opportunity and need for the love of God to infiltrate our world. I've worked in a "Christian" workplace for most of my life, and part of my desire to move to a "secular" workplace was to carry out the Great Commission. I've even found that there are so many people who know the Lord that just need to be encouraged to follow hard after Him even in difficult circumstances. So no matter where I am, I need to be spreading Christ's love. I know many people have obeyed this command and been a huge encouragement to me.

I am not responsible for their salvation, but I am responsible to show them the love of God. So I need to always be checking my motives and reactions. I need to always be loving, kind, gracious, and gentle. I pray that the line that I bolded above will not be reflective of my time here on earth.

Lies

2011-01-22T09:41:00.000-05:00

While I regarded God as a tyrant I thought my sin a trifle; But when I knew Him to be my Father, then I mourned that I could ever have kicked against Him. When I thought God was hard, I found it easy to sin; but when I found God so kind, so good, so overflowing with compassion, I smote upon my breast to think that I could ever have ...rebelled against One who loved me so, and sought my good. C. Spurgeon

I spent some significant time in 2010 fighting the thoughts that God wasn't good. Satan was on the attack, and he took something very good and twisted it (as he is so good at doing) into thoughts of God not being good. A year ago, I would have laughed at you if you told me I would entertain thoughts of God not being good, but I underestimated Satan's deceitfulness. I'm glad that I'm seeing God more kind and good these days. It is helping me recover spiritually. Lies like that are poison to our souls. Always be on guard to Satan's tools. He is tricky, and it can cause some serious issues if you fall prey to him.

¹⁰ Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. ¹¹ Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes. ¹² For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. ¹³ Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. ¹⁴ Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, ¹⁵ and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. ¹⁶ In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. ¹⁷ Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. Ephesians 6:10-17

Hope in 2011

2011-01-08T11:34:00.000-05:00

God has been getting my attention over the last few days. Here are a few quotes I've come across that have come across my attention:

"Is your perspective ego-centric or theo-centric? You centered or God centered? It does matter." (Brian Smith, a friend)
". . . in the hope of eternal life, which God, who cannot lie, promised long ages ago, . . . " Titus 1:2
"Faith is not a sense, nor sight, nor reason, but taking God at His word." Evans (don't know which Evans, sorry)
"The beginning of anxiety is the end of faith, and the beginning of true faith, is the end of anxiety." George Mueller
"You will never learn faith in comfortable surroundings." (Cowan, I think)
"The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, Because he trusts in You. Trust in the LORD forever,
For in GOD the LORD, we have an everlasting Rock." Isaiah 26:3-4

Hope must be in the Lord. If I hope in anything else, it is only false hope. I've spent a year thinking I was hoping in the Lord, but finding out that I really wasn't . . . hence why 2010 was such a rough year. But I asked the Lord to increase my faith a little over a year ago, and He did it. As as you see by the possible Cowan quote above, that is never easy.

So 2010 was a tough year, but I believe that my faith has increased, and I try to keep my hope in the Lord.

My hope is in the Lord

Who gave Himself for me,

And paid the price of all my sin at Calvary.

Chorus

For me He died,

For me He lives,

And everlasting life and light He freely gives.

No merit of my own

His anger to suppress.

My only hope is found in Jesus’ righteousness.

Chorus

And now for me He stands

Before the Father’s throne.

He shows His wounded hands and names me as His own.

Chorus

His grace has planned it all,

’Tis mine but to believe,

And recognize His work of love and Christ receive.

Chorus

(Norman Clayton)

Faith in 2010

2010-12-30T15:40:00.000-05:00

What a year it has been. God is constantly instructing the Israelites to remember in the Old Testament, and in many ways I want to just move on to 2011. The two biggest and best things from 2010 was my job change & my second trip to China. I'm very blessed in my new position, and I'm extremely grateful to God for opening the door for me to work in this new place. It was also a joy to visit friends serving in China. The gracious people of China taught me alot of things like being hospitable to foreigners. For the most part, though, this year has been a year of status quo.

Spiritually, I feel like this year has been a waste, but I know it hasn't been. I know that even though it seemed very dry and barren much like the picture of part of China above, God is using it to continue to teach me. It is in these times that I learn perseverance. I choose to believe what I know to be true, whether I feel it or not. This is really difficult to do, but that is faith. "Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen." Hebrews 11:1 (NASB) God is so gracious and allows us to see many things that we do have faith in, but not always. So I'm grateful for the year to build my faith, but . . .

I am very much looking forward to a new year to see what God has in store for this year.

In Relationship

2010-11-01T20:15:00.000-04:00

"You cannot produce trust just like you cannot 'do' humility. It either is or is not. Trust is the fruit of a relationship in which you know you are loved. Because you do not know that I love you, you cannot trust me." (line from the "Holy Spirit" in The Shack)

I find that I am always trying to be what God wants me to be . . . whatever that is. I am trying to abide by the law and be holy. I should act like this, and love like that, and go to this place, and do what I don't really want to do. Honestly, selfishness is a lot more fun.

I think I have it all backwards . . . not that I should go out and "live like hell", but I am a human being who doesn't "get" God. I am so glad that I can't completely comprehend Him, bkz if I did, why would I want to worship or obey Him? But the more I try to conjure up my holiness or devotion to the Lord, the more I fail miserably. Have I become so foolish again, as the Galatians were? Galatians 3:3: "Are you so foolish? Having begun by the Spirit, are you now being perfected by the flesh?" It all comes back to my self-sufficiency. I can do it. No actually, . . . I can't. It starts here with humility and God-dependency not self-sufficiency.

I can't conjure up the fruit of the Spirit, they are characteristics or the results of being in the Spirit. When I spend time with Him, I see the world more as He sees it. Then I begin to see the fruit of the spirit in my life. I can't conjure up peace or love. These only come as a result of abiding in the Lord. It comes from developing intimacy with Him.

So all of these things that I crave to have in my life come from relationship with Him. How do I develop relationship with Him? I have some pat answers I could give to myself, but obviously that would be depending on me again.

So God, please teach me how to have intimacy with You. Help me to run into Your arms like a child and trust You unconditionally .

And friends, pray that God would teach us all how to have intimacy with Him.

Does your Church look like this Bar?

2010-10-23T13:13:00.000-04:00

So you know the theme song to Cheers? It is unfortunate that this was the theme song to a show about a bar, but the interesting part is that the people at bars get community. The church doesn't get community. We should. We have been commanded to live in community, but we don't do it well at all. Greet one another. Comfort one another. Forgive one another. Build one another up. Serve one another. Encourage one another. Meet with one another. Be kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving one another. Receive one another. Love one another. Show hospitality to one another. Bear one another's burdens. Pray for one another. Care for one another. Minister to one another. And many more.

We do these things when they are convenient, but is there any place where you feel like you can be real with someone about your struggles and the dirtiness of your life? I'm hospitable, when it suits me. But God you want them to come to my house? Their kids destroy the place. You want me to greet her? She is so rude to me. You want me to meet with him? He is so socially awkward.

Below are the full lyrics to the song, "Where Everybody Knows Your Name" by Gary Portnoy & Judy Hart Angelo. Think about them. Would you go to your church in these circumstances? Is everyone glad you came? I encourage you to be the initiator to making your church become more like this bar.

Making your way in the world today

Takes everything you've got;

Taking a break from all your worries

Sure would help a lot.

Wouldn't you like to get away?

All those nights when you've got no lights,

The check is in the mail;

And your little angel

Hung the cat up by it's tail;

And your third fiance didn't show;

Sometimes you want to go

Where everybody knows your name,

And they're always glad you came;

You want to be where you can see,

Our troubles are all the same;

You want to be where everybody knows your name.

Roll out of bed, Mr. Coffee's dead;

The morning's looking bright;

And your shrink ran off to Europe,

And didn't even write;

And your husband wants to be a girl;

Be glad there's one place in the world

Where everybody knows your name,

And they're always glad you came;

You want to go where people know,

People are all the same;

You want to go where everybody knows your name.

Where everybody knows your name,

And they're always glad you came;

Where everybody knows your name,

And they're always glad you came...

Listen to the song online at this link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEq5M1wA4hk&feature=related

Why God? Why?

2010-10-13T10:34:00.000-04:00

As I go through life and talk to people in the counseling office, I often encounter the word "Why?" On a side note, I find it interesting that people who don't even believe in God will ask "Why does God allow this?" Anyway, why does God allow His people to suffer? Why do things happen that make absolutely no sense to us?

I don't have all the answers for sure! If I did, then I would be God, and we would all be in trouble! :) But I've learned some things along the way . . . even this morning as I was asking God why He allows some of the things that He allows in my life.

First, and most importantly, we aren't God. Therefore, we can't comprehend Him. We can't always follow His line of thinking. Romans 11:33-35 bring me great comfort here.
Secondly, sometimes I think I can follow His way of thinking. Maybe it is when I'm intimate enough with Him that I can see things as He does, but I think it is more that He allows me in on some things to keep me from whining :)
Thirdly, it is about Him, not about me. Everything is for His glory, and we should want our life to bring Him glory at all times. (I Corinthians 10:31) Do everything for His glory, even suffer.
Finally, since we can't comprehend Him, it pushes us to do what being a believer is at its core . . . Trust. We chose to have faith in Him, and when we don't rest in His will, we aren't trusting Him at all. Trust the Papa . . . He knows what is best. He doesn't want to hurt us. He wants what is best for us. Small children look at parents as if they are being betrayed when parents allow doctors to inject the child with a vaccine. It is a small amount of pain to ward off greater pain. Going to college for 8 years isn't pleasant, but the reward that comes from endurance is worth it. There are alot of different directions to go here, but we can't see the other side. He can. So to avoid anxiety & stress . . . learn to trust that He has your best interest in mind. I didn't say He has your comfort in mind; I said He has your best in mind. (Romans 8:28).

I have so many things I could say here, bkz life can be really painful at times; but trusting Him is so much more relaxing, and it is what He asks for.

I'll end with the lyrics from Bring the Rain by Mercy Me:

I can count a million times

People asking me how I

Can praise You with all that I've gone through

The question just amazes me

Can circumstances possibly

Change who I forever am in You

Maybe since my life was changed

Long before these rainy days

It's never really ever crossed my mind

To turn my back on you, oh Lord

My only shelter from the storm

But instead I draw closer through these times

So I pray

Bring me joy, bring me peace

Bring the chance to be free

Bring me anything that brings You glory

And I know there'll be days

When this life brings me pain

But if that's what it takes to praise You

Jesus, bring the rain

I am Yours regardless of

The dark clouds that may loom above

Because You are much greater than my pain

You who made a way for me

By suffering Your destiny

So tell me what's a little rain

So I pray

Holy, holy, holy

Is the Lord God Almighty

To Know the Power of His Resurrection

2010-09-28T10:18:00.000-04:00

I often find myself impressed with myself. Look at how well I behave. Look at how "selfless" that action was. I'm such a good person. God must be glad to have me on His team! I'm sure that God is just shaking His head in disappointment when I think these things.

If anyone had the right to say that, it was Paul. In Philippians 3:4-6, he talks about who he was, and it is an impressive resume in those days. But in verse 7, he continues on: "But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ. More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ, and may be found in Him, not having a righteousness of my own derived from the Law, but that which is through faith in Christ, the righteousness which comes from God on the basis of faith, (I'll stop here--end of verse 9--momentarily, as I always feel like Paul spoke in run on sentences! :)).

Paul was someone, as far as humans go, but even he said that he counts it all as loss for Christ's sake. It is all worthless if you don't know Christ as Lord. He wanted Christ so badly, that he would give up everything that made him who he was in order to be with Him. Would you give up your car if it meant you would lose Christ? Would you give up your job if it meant you would lose Christ? Would you give up your family? What is your most prized possession? Would you give it up for Him? This is a good rule of thumb to test where your heart is. If it would be too much for you to give up your friends, children, job, car, life, etc for the sake of Christ, then you don't really want to know Him. I had some friends that gave up their really good jobs and lives here in the US to go to China. Even believers thought they were crazy bkz he was an attorney! It didn't make sense . . . but He was calling them to go, and they don't regret it at all.

Paul continues in verses 10-11 (NASB): "that I may know Him and the power of His resurrection and the fellowship of His sufferings, being conformed to His death; in order that I may attain to the resurrection from the dead." He would give it all up so he could know Christ and the power of His resurrection and even the fellowship of His sufferings. He gave it all up, knowing that it wasn't going to be easy, but it was worth it all.

I remember several years ago when this became real to me that I needed to know Him & the Power of His Resurrection. Why was that so important? The answer revolutionized my life. I need to get back to that place. Lord, please take me back to that place.

Gratitude

2010-09-21T16:36:00.000-04:00

On Saturday evening, our normally very hot tap water got even hotter. It was nearly boiling coming out of the tap. I didn't think much about it until the next morning, when I was almost done my shower and realized the water wasn't very hot. My poor husband had even less hot water. By the time he was done his shower, there was no hot water. Later that afternoon, there was still no hot water. So Miles went downstairs and did a few things like flipped the breaker and reset the water heater, but to no avail. We had no hot water.

Miles was going to be gone all day the next day, and he wouldn't have an opportunity to look at the water heater until Tuesday. I was frustrated, but knew that I had other options for the morning. It was so inconvenient to go to the gym before work though! I prayed, "God, would you please fix our water heater? We don't have the time or the money to deal with it this week." (not that there is ever a week that we have time or money to deal with it :)).

Monday morning we had no hot water, so I went to work out and get a hot shower at the gym. I was grateful for that option. I was reminded that every time something goes wrong with our house and I'm inconvenienced, I remember my friends who are serving overseas and don't have regular water or electricity. I prayed for them a few times throughout the day. I went to Target where the cashier politely responded to my "how was your day?" with the same question. Well honestly the entire day was a bit ridiculous, but I just said, "Fine, except we don't have any hot water at our house." But being reminded of my friends who live in a country that has more water per capita than anywhere else in the world, but they don't have the infrastructure to support it (meaning they often don't have water at all), I added, "But at least I have running water." The cashier responded, "That is true. What a good way to look at it."

So I went home trying to remember that I need to be more grateful then I am. I look at our kitchen counters covered with dishes bkz we can't wash them, and I think, "What would Trichelle (one of our overseas friends) do?" Well, she'd boil water to wash them in. So I put the teapot on the stove. I was rearranging the dishes, so I could create the most efficient environment for washing the dishes. I got something on my finger, so I turned on the tap to wash it off out of habit. THE WATER WAS HOT!!! God fixed our water heater! Thanks God!

As I reflected back on the previous day or so, I was reminded how I take things for granted, and how much less stressed I was when I just accepted my situation and did the best I could with it. God doesn't always work that way, but I'm so grateful that He did. He is the Giver of all good gifts (James 1:17).

Security

2010-08-13T10:40:00.003-04:00

I'm a security addict. I was raised that way. "Always have a back up plan." The problem with this philosophy, is that you can't control much. The more that you try to control, the more stressed out you become because things happen that no one can do anything about.

This month I've been rereading Who I am in Christ by Neil Anderson; probably my favorite book next to Scripture. If you haven't read it, you really need to. Actually, it comes from Victory Over the Darkness also by Neil Anderson, so you should read that first to get the full picture. Today I read about "I Am Secure." This chapter reminded me how much I try unsuccessfully to make my life secure. I need a job that pays more. Maybe I should sell this, and sell that, and purchase this or that. Maybe I should put my money here or there, or move here or there. It is quite stressful, especially when you can't get it to work like you think it should. And trust me . . . when God wants to remind you that He is in control not you, none of those things will work out.

Today, I'm going to move into my new office. I'm no longer a counselor by profession, and I'm quite excited about that. I will still be in the field of psychology though . . . a psychology teacher. I'm very excited to empty our home office of all of my work office stuff so I can clean both places! :) This transition keeps running through my mind as I'm contemplating my security. It is a tenured position if I choose to go that route. It is a pretty secure position as long as I don't do anything that breaks any serious rules in the next few years. How important is tenure though? Tenure is great, but I shouldn't put alot of stock into it bkz my security can't lay in my job. God is my security. I need to remember this always.

I hope that I can remember that for today, that will be the first victory. I have some short term memory problems when it comes to truth bkz Satan is always coming in distracting me from the truth. So today is the goal . . . God is my security, not my job, my husband, my health, my education . . . just God.

Childlike Faith pt. 2

2010-07-05T20:26:00.005-04:00

Above is my oldest sister and 2 her granddaughters. The girls were pretty excited about this gift of a marble roller. They played with it for a long time. They never gave a gift to anyone else. They never questioned whether they were worthy of the gift. They just excitedly accepted the gift & lived in the happiness that that gift offered.

Children have always been dependent, so they just receive without question. Jesus even accepted gifts without question. As an infant, He was given gold, frankincense, and myrrh. As an adult, He was anointed by an extremely expensive perfume from a lady demonstrating how much she loved Him. His disciples spent three years of their life following closely after Him. Mary sat at Jesus feet and adored Him. He just accepted these gifts of love without question.

How well do you accept gifts? Do you tell people that you don't want their charity? Do you tell people that you can buy it yourself? Do you tell God that you are too guilty to accept His grace? You aren't too guilty. His grace is big enough.

Childlike Faith pt. 3

2010-07-05T20:16:00.007-04:00

Here is a picture of my husband with our 4 year old grand niece. She completely trusts Miles not to drop her. This is the kind of trust we need to have.

Children by nature trust. Unfortunately, we have to teach them not to trust some people, and they learn not to trust bkz they get hurt along the way. But I love to watch most young children trust.

Jesus trusted His Father so much, that He laid His life in His hands. "Abba, Father," He said. "everything is possible for You. Take this cup from Me. Yet not what I will, but what You will." Mark 14:36 (NIV)

Our doubts stand in the way of us having an intimate relationship with our Father. We question why He allows things to happen or why He doesn't answer our prayers like we believe that they should be answered. Who are we to question His plan? We need to trust Him . . . intimately & completely. Sure we are going to have questions bkz we aren't God. We aren't going to be able to comprehend why He allows certain things or whatever we don't understand. If we completely understood God, then He would cease to be God.

We are called to trust Him or to believe in Him. "...Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved..." Acts 16:31 NASB. This isn't intellectual assent, but a trust. Faith is active. This means trusting Him to do and be what He says He will do and be. Living life in the freedom that is ours.

It isn't an unhealthy dependence but a childlike trust in Someone Who is completely deserving of our trust. Will you trust Him?

Childlike Faith pt. 1

2010-07-05T19:48:00.006-04:00

I'm still reading Reaching for the Invisible God by Philip Yancey, and I still love what I'm learning. He relates part of a message by Frederick Buechner that I want to use for 3 posts to help grasp it all well. This is the first post. To the right, you see a classroom of Chinese children taking in every word that their teacher is saying. They believe that what she is saying is true.

And He said, "I tell you the truth, unless you change & become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." Matthew 18:3 NIV

What exactly is He saying here? Why would I want to be like a child? We tell adults not to act like children, and yet He tells us to become like children. Are we wrong? Buechner differentiates between childish and childlike. Here are 3 childlike (not childish) traits that we need to have.

Children have faith. When we exercise radical faith, some people might tell us, "You aren't being logical." Or "Think about what you are doing! It doesn't make sense!" We don't say that to children, we just write it off as them being kids. They don't know any better. But we need to adopt some their faith that is grounded in the Word.

The centurion approached Jesus about healing his servant. The paralytic's friends lowered him through a rooftop. Peter stepped out onto the water. Disciples recognized Jesus who was standing among them to be the same Jesus that died on the cross a few days earlier. Most adults would never do these things. "He is too ill, besides Jesus doesn't have time to come heal your servant." "Are you crazy? Lower me through a roof?!?!" "You can't walk on water!" "I saw Him die with my own eyes! It can't be Jesus!"

These are some instances that Jesus commends their faith. These are the kinds of things that children wouldn't think twice about doing. I hold out little hope for change in some things. I settle for what is instead of hope in what He could do. I don't believe God will heal me, but only make me stronger through the struggle. (Though this last one could be true, it isn't necessarily the truth for all situations.)

We need to have faith that defies reason. I have a friend that defies reason with their faith. I sometimes wonder about them, and inwardly laugh at the ridiculousness of their claims. But after seeing what I've seen through their faith, I don't laugh very much anymore. I catch myself and remember, "Well . . . maybe." But I need to take it further, and pray confidently and in faith, trusting Him to carry out His will. Maybe my faith will change something . . . even me!

Forced to Meditate

2010-06-16T11:32:00.004-04:00

I am so busy . . . doing nothing. I work a job to pay for my stuff which truly has no value. I have a great job that gives me summers off, and I waste those summers. This summer, we've been traveling quite a bit for Miles' work which means it isn't necessarily fun bkz his schedule is fairly regulated, though I enjoy traveling a great deal with my husband. This hotel isn't much to look at from the outside, but it is completely renovated inside, and actually really nice. So today as I sit in a hotel room in OK waiting for the pool to open and my husband to come back for lunch, I have a lot of time to think.
So it is Central Time Zone, so I'm awake way earlier than I normally am with nothing to do. So I made my way over to a walking track for about an hour, but I still have an hour until the pool opens. What should I do with my time? I could watch tv, Heaven knows there are enough channels to find something to watch even if it is Day 58 (or whatever day it is) of the oil spill. What a waste of time . . .

I had my "routine" quiet time earlier this morning, but I decided to read for a little longer. I know that meditation is not my forte, so God is giving me lots of down time to work on it. 11 hours in the car yesterday, and hours upon hours for the next few days. I might as well try to find a good way to use my down time. I like that God is forcing me to learn to meditate bkz this morning I read a very familiar verse that showed me the benefits of meditating on Him: He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water, which yields its fruit in its season and its leaf does not wither; and in whatever he does, he prospers. Ps. 1:3

Meditation is worth working on. Teach me Lord!

King of Kings & Lord of Lords

2010-06-09T15:25:00.003-04:00

"...a friend in Japan wrote that he has understood the proper spirit of prayer more by listening to the Japanese Christians than from the teaching American missionaries. 'We know how to come to God as humble servants with boldness,' he says. 'You don't have to tell Japanese people about hierarcy. When they learn that God is the Lord they immediately know all the implications of that. They know who's boss and that is never questioned. When they pray they use language that combines the highest form of speech and the most intimate phrases of love and devotion. When they ask for something they ask with true humility, knowing they have no right to what they're asking except that God gives them the very right to ask and promises to answer.'" (p. 130, Reaching for the Invisible God, Yancey)

This paragraph really grabbed my attention. It is interesting how living in a republic (non-pure democracy) we miss out on what the Japanese (and many other cultures) understand automatically about God. Our culture tells us that we can say whatever we want and if we don't like what the president says than we can be disrespectful (if we so choose). Try that in a monarchy or other hierarchical society. It won't work out very well. We are taught to be independent and think for ourselves. I'm not saying that all of these things are horrible, but it doesn't help us understand God any better.

God is the King of Kings & Lord of Lords. He is the ultimate authority. You don't question the authority figure. You aren't disrespectful to Him. I like the quote about being humble servants with boldness. It made me think of Esther, and how she knew that the Xerxes was the King as well as her husband. He could kill her if she went before him without his permission. I know that God could kill me if He wanted, but I know I can go boldly before Him because He loves me. Here is the key difference. Earthly kings don't love their subjects like God does. We have direct access to a God & King Who loves us deeply.

It shines a whole new light on Who He is . . .

Take the Time

2010-06-08T15:55:00.004-04:00

I've been reading a fantastic book by Philip Yancey, though I like most of his books. It is entitled Reaching for the Invisible God: What can we expect to find? I've been constantly challenged in my relationship with God from this book as I continue to attempt to draw closer to God. I will just stick with what I learned today for now though.

"Monastics have a practice they call statio that means, simply, stopping one thing before beginning another. . . After reading from a book, pause and think back through what you learned and how you were moved. After watching a television show, pause and ask what it contributed to your life. Before reading the Bible, pause and ask for a spirit of attention. Do this often enough and even mechanical acts become conscious, mindful. I find that if I take time to pray for the recipient before beginning to compose a letter or before making a phone call, it makes the tasks less of a chore and more of an opporutnity in which to receive or express God's grace." (p. 168)

This is how I, and most Americans, DON'T live their lives. We rush around from one thing to another. I find myself very busy this summer, and I have next to nothing to do. I am rarely just still, but to stop and think about everything that I'm about to do or have just done? As a counselor by profession, I feel like I probably think about things more than the average person, but I don't do it nearly enough. I know that when I stop and think about things instead of rushing around, I learn and grow.

Scripture talks about meditating on His Word alot (e.g. Ps. 1: 2), and I don't take the time to do that often enough. I get the task done of reading His Word, but do I meditate on it? Do I take the time to allow the Word to sink in and change me? He promises that His word will change me if I meditate on it (Romans 12:2).

So I'm challenged to not take any more mental breaks, and to be intentionally focused on the Lord and every opportunity that He puts in my life. It will be slow at first, but I've done it before. It is possible. One step at a time . . .

Victim No More

2010-05-31T10:48:00.004-04:00

******My thoughts are a bit scattered this morning, and for that I apologize. I hope the heart of the message came through though. ******

As the month of May and my position as a counselor come to an end, I've been thinking about my life. I've been trying to evaluate what has happened to me over the last year or so. My relationship with God has been mediocre at best. Why? As I was thinking through all of that, I realized that I'm asking the wrong question. The question isn't what has happened to me, but what have I chosen to do. It seems that I've played the role of victim, something which I'm constantly encouraging the people that I counsel not to do. It wasn't until this morning that I actually realized that that is what is happening. I've taken a helpless, apathetic perspective on life & God waiting for things to change without taking any serious steps forward to make that change.

I was reading through James this morning, and it says in James 2:21-22, "Was not Abraham our father justified by works when he offered up Isaac his son on the altar? You see that faith was working with his works, and as a result of the works, faith was perfected;" Abraham was acting on his faith, and his faith was perfected. I need to be acting on my faith, instead of sitting on my rear end waiting for things to come to me.

I was also reading a blog by a student in India. She talked about being in India and experiencing it, but realizing that she is in India to be a part of what God is doing there. I am in America taking it all in, but not being a part of what God is doing here. I need to get off my rump & start acting on my faith.

God has been reminding me that He loves me, and that I love Him & others in direct correlation with how much I understand that. I've obviously lost sight of that some. Whether I feel it or not, I know that God loves me, and I need to live in faith by acting on the fact that He loves me . . . so I need to love others and go to them. I can't have the victim mentality and wait for everyone to come to me.

God, help me to act on Your love for me, by loving others & having my eyes open to the work that you are doing around me. Help me to jump in & not wait around for someone else to do it or wait for when I feel like it.

Spending Time with God

2010-05-18T12:43:00.002-04:00

I've gotten too regimented in my time with God, and it is killing my relationship with Him. The last 2 posts that I made were not made from reading Scripture but from spending time in conversation with God. Now what God showed me during that time matched up with Scripture, but I didn't get it by reading. I'm not saying we shouldn't read Scripture . . . so please don't misunderstand me. But my soul longs for intimacy with my Father, and it doesn't come from just reading Scripture mechanically. We must spend time with Him.

I just read an article by Gary Moon entitled "Getting Scripture All the Way Through Me." He talked about a man in his family that read the entire Bible literally a couple hundred times, and yet he was the meanest, angriest, and most hateful person that he knew. He was reading too much & too fast to allow an intimate relationship with the Author. So spend time meditating, praying, seeing God in everything from coffee to porches to trees to golf. He is constantly wanting to show us Himself. Look for Him!

Lord, I long hard after you; please fill my soul.

More Thoughts on Imago Dei

2010-05-14T11:36:00.004-04:00

So I walked the Greenway again the other day, and continued to pray for people, and God continued to show me more about how His image is in each person. I watched people enjoy talking, laughing, walking, and just being together. Some may be believers, others are not. As a believer, I wonder, how do unbelievers find some level of joy without Him? Why do we all seek to be in relationship with others? Why do we want to be married or have deep friendships? Bkz being in relationship with another person who is created in His image (whether believers or not), is giving us a taste of being in relationship with Him. We find some fulfillment with these relationships bkz we are in relationship with someone who was created in His image. But we, being created in His image, aren't Him; so we find the relationships only partly fulfilling.

The only fulfilling relationship is with the Father. He will complete us totally, and do it perfectly! So seek hard to develop your relationship with Him, and be careful to treat those created in His image with love & respect.

Imago Dei

2010-05-07T10:04:00.003-04:00

Last evening, I was walking the Greenway in Cleveland, TN. I've taken up walking instead of running, bkz I've found that it is actually more stress relieving than running. It just takes longer. So in order to make the time faster, I decided to pray. I get very easily distracted when I pray, so God told me to pray for every person that I passed. If you've ever been on the Greenway in the evenings when it is beautiful out, you'll know this can be a challenge.

I passed some young teenage girls and prayed for them to know that they are loved & valuable to God. I passed an older couple, and prayed that they would love their families well & be encouraged by those around them. I passed an older woman, and I prayed that she wouldn't feel alone. I passed these 2 young boys that were trying to get my attention, and I prayed that God would put good mentors in their lives to give them good attention. I prayed for young moms that were screaming at their kids about how they are such "brats," and I prayed that God would give the moms patience, love, and encouragement for their kids. That their significant others would love them well, and encourage them. That the kids would know that they are valuable & loved by God. I prayed that all of them would come to know God if they didn't already. I passed a middle aged woman with a mentally challenged young man, and I prayed for patience with him & comprehension of God for him. Whatever God laid on my heart, I prayed.

I found that as I prayed I began to see people differently. I didn't get annoyed with the young boys acting rudely trying to get my attention. I didn't get angry with the moms screaming at their kids. I began to pity them. A homeless man walked by me, and God said, "Whether he knows me or not, he is created in My image." It is amazing how that changes things. I got in my car, and got frustrated with the driver in front of me. Instantly the Lord reminded me that they were created in His image. I have no idea what is going on in their life. Don't judge them.

So this morning, I was reading James 3 where it talks about controlling the tongue. I found verse 9 really fascinating in light of yesterday's experience: "With it we bless our Lord & Father, and with it we curse people who are made in the likeness of God." I went from blessing people for an hour on the Greenway to cursing them in my car. OUCH!

So it is my goal today, to bless the people that I come in conact with . . . at Walmart, in the car, on the Greenway, at work . . . bless and don't curse. They were all created in the image of God!

Twisted Truth

2010-05-02T09:42:00.005-04:00

It has been a rough several months, and I think I've finally come to the bottom of my funk. I've discovered a new lie in my life, that I'd not noticed before. About 4 years ago, I was on fire for God. I was always content, always happy, always speaking about Him, and things changed. I still stuck to the truth, but my joy was gone. I think it started about 2 years ago when I read a good book that I took to the extreme: Shattered Dreams by Larry Crabb. It is a great book with great points, but when taken to the extreme it makes God a kill-joy. I then kept running across the quote: God is more interested in our character than our comfort. Again, this is true, but when not balanced with other things like James 1:17 "Every good thing given & every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shifting shadow." or "Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart" (Psalm 37:4).

There seem to be a few things that Scripture teaches that we aren't smart enough to remember to balance. Predestination vs. Free will; Eternal security vs. Blasphemy; etc. We can't wrap our brains around them here, bkz we are finite, but Scripture addresses both sides of these issues. The same is true with what I have been believing . . . a truth twisted. God is more concerned with His glory & our character than our comfort or happiness, but He is still our Father. He still loves us. He still rejoices over you (Zeph.3:17).

So as I've been in my funk for the last several months, I've discovered that somewhere along the line, I started believing that bkz I want something, the Lord isn't going to give it to me. This is a complete contradiction to the 2 verses in the first paragraph (and there are more that teach this!). We have to understand that we'll never understand God this side of heaven, but we have Scripture & prayer that help us to try to make sense of it all.

I'm so glad that I serve a God that loves me, likes me, delights in me, and His joy is my strength!

David, a Man after God's Own Heart

2010-04-23T16:51:00.002-04:00

You know, I often am encouraged by David. He often messed up . . . royally. Lust, adultery, murder, deceit, concubines, etc. etc. But I've been reading through I & II Samuel recently, and I'm reminded that David was a pretty amazing guy in spite of his flaws. He refused to lay a hand on the Lord's anointed king even though that king was pursuing David's life. Before David took as much as a step, he would ask the Lord for direction. When the Lord answered him, he would ask him another question to be sure that he knew exactly what the Lord wanted him to do. I have enough trouble trying to remember to ask the Lord at all, but David made it is his priority, as we should.

The passage that most stood out to me other than David asking God for direction multiple times was after Bathsheba had the baby. David knew that his judgement was that the baby was going to die. He was on his face before God for 7 days while the baby was sick. He begged God for mercy on the child. After 7 days, the baby died, and David's servants were afraid to tell him bkz he was so upset about the baby being sick. When David found out, he got up, cleaned himself up, ate, went to the house of the Lord, and worshipped. He knew that this is what God told him would happen. He didn't whine, complain, or scream at God . . . he went & worshipped Him acknowleding God's sovereignty & power. (2 Samuel 12:15-23)

He was in significant pain, and he worshipped the Lord. When I'm in significant pain, the last thing I want to do is worship the Lord, but we should. James encourages this in chapter 1 as well. Pain, struggle, and trials all make us more like God. They teach us perseverence & endurance. When we can worship Him in the midst of difficulty & find our joy in Him, the contenment in His strength comes quickly. The goal of our lives should bring Him glory, and what better way to bring Him glory than by praising Him in the midst of pain. There isn't an unbeliever in the world that would get that . . . nor would alot of "believers."

I hope that I can learn to do this better each day.

2010-03-30T10:47:00.002-04:00

Alas! and did my Savior bleed

And did my Sovereign die?

Would He devote that sacred head

For sinners such as I?

The body slain, sweet Jesus, Thine--

And bathed in its own blood--

While the firm mark of wrath divine,

His sould in anguish stood.

Was it for crimes that I had done

He groaned upon the tree?

Amazing pity! Grace unknown!

And love beyond degree!

Well might the sun in darkness hide

And shut His glories in,

When Christ, the mighty Maker died,

For man the creatures sin.

Thus might I hide my blushing face

While His dear cross appears,

Dissolve my heart in thankfulness,

And melt my eyes to tears.

But drops of grief can ne'er repay

The debt of love I owe:

Here, Lord, I give myself away

'Tis all that I can do.

At the Cross by Isaac Watts

It is Easter week . . . the holiest celebration in our calendar, and it is overrun by eggs, bunnies, & Reese's. I have thought about everything but my Sovereign Lord's death. Without His death, I'm all the lies that I fight daily to not believe. I am worthless, without value, unloved, sinful, lonely, etc, etc. But bkz of the pain that He chose to go through, all of these lies are just that . . . Lies from the pit of hell.

I've borrowed The Passion of the Christ from a friend to watch this week. It is disturbing, and I didn't buy it bkz I don't ever want to become complacent towards the movie. I remember watching it in the theater several years ago. I remember the emotional reaction that I had towards it as well as the emotional reactions of complete strangers in that theater. I remember a grown man sobbing as he watched the movie. I remember watching it with my roommate. Tears streamed down our faces, and yet we were silent in our own processing. We didn't speak for nearly an hour later.

I've become complacent to the gospel message, and I hate my complacency. It is the turning point, not only in history, but also in my own life. I love the line in this hymn above that talks about the "debt of love I owe." I remember when I asked the Lord how to love Him, He reminded me of what He did for me. I was so stuck in my pride, that I didn't even see my sin. So I'm praying that the Lord will again show me how to love Him, so that I can gratefully sing the refrain to Watt's hymn:

At the cross, at the cross, where I first saw the light, and the burden of my heart rolled away, It was there by faith I received my sight & now I am happy all the day!

Michael W. Smith Says It Best

2010-03-29T13:32:00.003-04:00

Jesus I've forgotten the words that You have spoken
Promises burned within my heart have now grown dim
With a doubting heart I follow earthly wisdom
Forgive me for my unbelief, renew the fire again

I have built an altar where I worship things of men

I have taken journeys that have drawn me far from You

Now I am returning to Your mercies ever flowing

Pardon my transgressions, help me love You again

I have longed to know You & Your tender mercies

Like a river of forgiveness, ever flowing without end

I bow my heart before You in the goodness of Your presence

Your grace forever shining like a beacon in the night

Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy

Lord have mercy on me

Michael W. Smith

The Love of God

2010-02-24T16:32:00.003-05:00

This week, a friend & I have challenged each other to spend time at the Lord's feet, and meditating on one passage of Scripture unless the Lord leads us elsewhere. So Romans 8:31-39 is the passage:

"What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Who will bring a charge against God's elect? God is the one who justifies; who is the one who condemns? Christ Jesus is He who died, yes, rather who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who also intercedes for us. Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? Just as it is written, "FOR YOUR SAKE WE ARE BEING PUT TO DEATH ALL DAY LONG; WE WERE CONSIDERED AS SHEEP TO BE SLAUGHTERED." But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord."

There are a thousand things that I could point out in this passage, but I'll just share 2 thoughts. My first thought is that God is the One who justifies us; no one else. So if God justifies us, how could anyone else condemn us (including ourselves)?

My second thought is just bkz I'm experiencing some tribulation, does that mean God doesn't love me? Just bkz I'm experiencing some distress, does that mean God has stopped loving me? Just bkz I don't have any food, does that mean the Lord has ceased to love me? ABSOLUTELY NOT! And yet, I go there often. Why God are you allowing this in my life? It is so hard. Don't you care about me anymore? Do you still love me?

Yes, absolutely, more than I could ever know. I love the verses in Ephesians 3 (14-21) that Paul prays for the Ephesians, specifically the bolded portion in vs. 19.
For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen

He prays that they would know (experientially) the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge (it is intellectually incomprehensible!). I pray this for myself, and for other people as well. Oh that we would really come to experience His love which is unable to be known intellectually! Only He can do that . . . I can do nothing, except come before Him on my face with gratefulness and a willingness to live in light of that love.

Pursuit of Intimacy with the Lord

2010-02-18T12:18:00.003-05:00

I've been struggling recently with intimacy with the Lord, hence why my blogs are fewer & farther between for the last month or so. I can't tell the future, but I have this feeling that the next few blogs are going to be my journey of pursuing intimacy with the Lord again.

Emmanuel . . . God with us. He is here with me, but I have made my relationship with the Lord more intellectual again. I think some of it is a protection against my own struggles. Being a counselor can sometimes be difficult when you are struggling personally. I tend to fight off the same emotions that I encourage the people I talk to to engage with, afraid that I won't be able to think clearly enough to help them. This isn't a terrible thing, as long as I engage those emotions later, but I get used to holding them down . . . and it becomes my practice. Before I know it, everything is intellectual again.

It is easier & less draining to not engage my suffering. I often don't allow the Lord to enter into my suffering with me. Instead, I just tell myself the truth. Telling myself the truth is critical, but I can't ignore the pain in the process.

Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted. Matthew 5:4. If I don't mourn, then I can't be comforted by the Great Comforter, Emmanuel. So today, I'm going to try to allow the Lord to enter into my pain with me, bkz then I will be comforted with His great Love.

Fruit of the Spirit

2010-02-16T10:18:00.002-05:00

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

Gal. 6:22-23 (NASB)

We all know the fruit of the Spirit, but Iwhen was the last time you felt at peace? joy? love? kindness? Believers should be exuding love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, & self-control.

On Sunday, I was at a bookstore around 2pm, and the cashier was trying to create some conversation by asking if we knew if the church crowd was out yet. She went on to complain about the church crowd. She said, "I've never met so many pastors and Christians that are so miserable & angry as those coming out of church on Sunday afternoons." I've heard this similar comment out of most restaurant servers. Christians can be the worst tippers, but we should be the best tippers.

Am I reflecting Christ by living a life of love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, & self-control? I can't force myself to be these things without abiding in the Spirit. These characteristics are the fruit (or result) of abiding in the Spirit. So spend some good time with Him today, so that you can taste like the Spirit to those you come in contact with as well as having those things in your own life?

Do You Serve Wealth?

2010-01-20T10:08:00.003-05:00

Luke 16:13 (NASB) No servant can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be devoted to one and despise the other You cannot serve God and wealth.

Yes, I serve wealth. I don't have any, but we can serve it just as much not having much of it as having lots of it. Many decisions I make are based on the financial situation. The following thoughts are common for me . . .

"I don't have enough money for my bills, can I really spare a couple of dollars for this person who doesn't have food?" "I could be making money doing things instead of resting even though I've worked 50 hours this week." "I don't have time to be in the Word this morning, bkz I have to get to work."

Who does the providing? Me or God? In case you missed those multiple passages of Scripture, God is the one who provides, not me. But again . . . I make it about me. If I don't do it, it won't get done. The pride surfaces in yet another unique way.

Look at the 3 quotations above. In the first one, it is more important for me to take care of me instead of taking care of the need that God has presented to me to love someone else. Interestingly enough, I have plenty of food, I could even afford to go without some food, but my bills are more important than this person's life. In the second one, it is about not taking care of my body and insisting that I am the one who should be making the money instead of God. In the third one, I'm prioritizing making money, or my priorities, over God and my relationship with Him.

He tells us that the greatest commandments are to love Him with all of our being & love our neighbor as ourselves. I see the exact opposite in those quotes.

So who are you really serving? God or money (or something else).

Forgiveness of the Father

2010-01-19T10:07:00.002-05:00

As I was reading the story of the Lost Son this morning in Luke 15, I was confronted again with how forgiving the father is. My initial judgmental thought was "this kid went out and squandered his inheritance, and the father actually ran out to meet him & hugged him." As soon as the father saw that the son was repentant, he ran to meet his son.

God reminded me that that is how much He loves and forgives me. Even though I keep falling back into my sin, He still comes running to take me back when I repent of that sin.

The key is my repentant spirit. Am I really sorry that I've sinned? I get comfort from my sin. No . . . comfort comes from God. Does my sin really disgust me as much as it disgusts God? Remember what He did for you, and it will help you be disgusted that your sin is the reason He died such a terrible death.

Preach the gospel to yourself today, and remember the sin, the payment, the forgiveness, the positional holiness.

Counting the Cost

2010-01-16T10:43:00.002-05:00

This morning I was reading Luke 14. There are a number of familiar verses in this chapter to me, but I was intrigued about the placement of these particular verses:

"For which one of you, when he wants to build a tower, does not first sit down and calculate the cost to see if he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a foundation and is not able to finish, all who observe it begin to ridicule him, saying, 'This man began to build and was not able to finish.'"(v.28-31)

I thought this was a good passage on being a good planner. Put some thought into things before you do them. And yes, we should put some thought into things, but this is in the context of the cost of discipleship. True discipleship is costly! Look at the previous verses:

"If anyone comes to Me, and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be My disciple. Whoever does not carry his own cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple." v.26-27. V. 33 continues, "So then, none of you can be My disciple who does not give up all his own possessions."

Jesus is telling us that we need to really think through if we are willing to pay the cost for being His disciple. Being His disciple isn't something you just do on the side or when you feel like it. It requires your life. You no longer matter in the grand scheme of things. Yes, He loves you, and you belong to Him. He has given you value, forgiveness, etc, but it is all about Him . . . not me. It is about Him who grants me those things, not about the receiver of those gifts.

Forgive me John MacArthur for this very loose quote, and I'm not even certain of the source, but I believe it is in The Gospel According to Jesus. He says something to the effect of: "We don't explain the gospel well enough to give people a chance to not choose it." We water down the gospel so much that people say, "Yes, I want to go to Heaven or have my sins forgiven or have joy, etc.", but they don't see that we need to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him.

Have you counted the cost, or are you trying to be a disciple half time (which isn't a disciple at all)?

Better is One Day in Your Courts

2009-12-31T12:13:00.000-05:00

I was reading in Luke 9 this morning, and Jesus was talking about discipleship. Following Jesus isn't easy. He requires alot of us. The people that He invited to follow Him made excuses "Let me bury my father first" (v.59). In v. 61, they wanted to go and say goodbye to their family first. I understand from many theologians that these people weren't saying, "Wait a minute, let me literally go say goodbye, and I'll be right back." They were saying, when my dad dies, then I'll come follow You. Regardless of what is literally being said here, Jesus requires His followers to be fully committed to Him. Nothing is priority over Him. I remember saying, "God don't come until I graduate from school or until I get married or until I have kids." The reality was that this life was more important to me than He was.

Don't get me wrong, I haven't fully arrived. One day, when I get to Heaven, maybe I will have arrived . . . but for now, I struggle on . . . daily battling my fleshly desires. I have graduated & I have gotten married. I don't have any kids, and I'm not financially secure, but I battle daily to make sure that my priorities are His priorities. I battle daily to be sure that I don't wish my life away so that I can finally give my everything to Him. I hear often, "Well, I'm too busy. School (or work, or family, or church activities, or tv shows) takes too much of my time." Guess what, your life is never going to slow down. You need to make a choice to make His priorities your priorities.

I was listening to Pandora this morning, and Better is One Day in Your Courts came on. I'm finding that it is much better to be in His courts for a few minutes than a lifetime anywhere else.

Glory to God in the Highest

2009-12-18T10:43:00.000-05:00

Christmas is about worshipping God. The shepherds came to worship. The wise men came and worshipped, and we should too. Everything is about God getting the glory, so why wouldn't Christmas be about God's glory too?

Simeon in Luke 2 is a great example of this. First off, I was under the impression that Mary & Joseph brought Jesus to the temple to see Simeon & Anna. I thought that Simeon was doing the circumcision or something. But upon closer reading of Luke 2, this isn't at all the case. Simeon was just a righteous & devout follower of God who lived in Jerusalem and was waiting for the promised Messiah. The Holy Spirit directed him to the temple when Mary & Joseph came there, so he could see the promised Messiah in the flesh. He sees Jesus & blesses God.

"And he [Simeon] came in the Spirit into the temple; and when the parents brought in the child Jesus, to carry out for Him the custom of the Law, then he took Him into his arms, and blessed God, and said, 'Now Lord, You are releasing Your bond-servant to depart in peace, According to Your word; For my eyes have seen Your salvation, Which You have prepared in the presence of all peoples, A LIGHT OF REVELATION TO THE GENTILES, And the glory of Your people Israel.'" (Luke 2:27-32)

Anna the prophetess does the same thing. She comes up at the moment that Simeon is speaking. "At that very moment she came up and began giving thanks to God, and continued to speak of Him to all those who were looking for the redemption of Jerusalem." (vs 38).

How much do we bless God this season? Half of the Christmas carols talk about giving Him glory, but do we focus on that? We are supposed to do it all the time, but we get so caught up in life. Take time each day & give GLORY TO GOD IN THE HIGHEST!

Do the ends justify the means?

2009-12-18T10:22:00.001-05:00

Just before Jesus ministry began, he was in the wilderness, and Satan came to tempt Him (Luke 4). Satan suggested that Jesus make stones into bread bkz Jesus was hungry. On the surface, nothing seems wrong with this request, but Satan was asking Him to prove He was the Son of God by making stones into bread. Jesus, in His pride or arrogance, could have done so to say, "See what I can do? See Who I am?" But He had nothing to prove to Satan, so He responded with "Man shall not live on bread alone" (vs. 4).

So then Satan offers Jesus all the kingdoms of the world if Jesus would just bow down and worship him. Jesus could avoid all of the pain and suffering that He would experience in about 3 years if He just bowed down to worship Satan. It seems a whole lot easier, bkz then the kingdoms of the world would belong to Jesus and His death would be unnecessary. But He submitted to God's will, and didn't allow Satan to get any glory. Only God deserves glory. He responded, "You shall worship the Lord Your God and serve Him only" (vs. 8).

The third time Satan takes Him up on the pinnacle of the temple, and says basically, "Go ahead and show off . . . if You throw yourself off of this pinnacle, You can command angels to come save You. That would be cool to show off Your power." Satan even quotes Scripture to try to convince Jesus. But Jesus responds, "You shall not put the Lord Your God to the test" (vs. 12).

Jesus was more concerned about God's agenda . . . and not just the end result of God's agenda, but the process as well. He followed God's will, and He didn't break any of God's laws in the process.

The Catholic church has a law that exempts lying in self-defense of life, person, & property, but God is clear that lying is sin. If we have to sin to carry out what we think it God's will, then the means probably isn't God's will. Don't you think that God would take care of us if we chose to do what He commands us to do?

Pondering Joseph & Mary's Journey

2009-12-15T10:46:00.000-05:00

I'm always intrigued by the songs that people have written about Mary & Joseph. They pose intriguing questions and thoughts of what might have been going through their heads. Like "when you kiss your little baby, you kiss the face of God?" (Mary Did You Know). "How could it be this baby in my arms, sleeping now, so peacefully, the Son of God, how could it be?" (Joseph's song).

I started reading Luke the other day, since I had finished Judges, and was looking for somewhere to go. The Christmas story seemed appropriate. God has shown me more this year than ever before about the story. I've been able to put myself in their shoes a little more. Yesterday, when I was reading about Zacharias & Elizabeth, I thought it was interesting that Zacharias referred to Jesus as "the Sunrise from on High." I liked that as you probably gathered from a recent blog.

This morning as I'm reading about the shepherds, an angel of the Lord appears to them, and they are afraid. I'm sure they were more than startled when it says "suddenly" (2:13) a multitude of heavenly host appeared. They go running to find this child, and then tell everyone what the angel told them "For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord." (2:11 & 17). The Savior that they had been waiting for and they had heard nothing about for 400 years was here!

Vs. 19 says, "but Mary treasured up all these things, pondering them in her heart." How cool to hear & observe these shepherds that she didn't know from Adam come running in to see the Savior. I'm sure Mary & Joseph didn't tell too many people for fear of people thinking they are nuts or for even talking about her being pregnant without being married. They probably laid low during her pregnancy as much as possible. It was like God continued to confirm for her that He was doing this, and she could trust Him, even though she had already committed to Him (1:38).

I love how when we obey Him willingly, He blesses us so much for our obedience. I think this is what Mary was treasuring in her heart. Do we obey willingly even if it will "look bad" to the world around us?

Come Thou Long Expected Jesus

2009-12-10T09:14:00.000-05:00

My new favorite Christmas carol is Come Thou Long Expected Jesus. I've been learning over the last few years more and more about Christmas. God's people had been waiting for the Messiah. After Malachi, there was 400 years of hearing nothing from God. Talk about trusting God! Those people waited a long time for God's promise to be fulfilled. Read the words to this song with those thoughts in mind.

Come, Thou long expected Jesus

Born to set Thy people free

From our fears and sins release us

Let us find our rest in Thee

Israel's strength and consolation

Hope of all the earth Thou art

Dear desire of every nation

Joy of ev'ry longing heart

Born Thy people to deliver

Born a child, and yet a King

Born to reign in us forever

Now Thy gracious Kingdom bring

By Thine own eternal Spirit

Rule in all our hearts alone

By Thine all sufficient merit

Raise us to Thy glorious throne

Israel's strength and consolation

Hope of all the earth Thou art

Dear desire of every nation

Joy of ev'ry longing heart

Come Jesus Come

So now, as we celebrate the fact that He did come even after 400 years of silence from God. He came, He lived, He died, & He rose again. AND He will also come again. We wait in expectation of His return. I get very tired of the fallenness of this world, and so let's reflect on Him . . . He is coming again to restore His kingdom. So I'm longing for the expected Jesus! Merry Christmas!

Sunrises

2009-12-07T13:40:00.000-05:00

Wow . . . it has been awhile since I posted. The Lord has been taking me through a very dry time, but He has still been faithful.

This morning, I walked out of my bedroom to the sunrise shining through the window. I love sunrises. God & I have this agreement that whenever I see a good sunrise or sunset, that I will stop & reflect on His love & faithfulness. So this morning, I stood in my living room, eating my yogurt, and pondering God's love & faithfulness to me.

As I watched the sun rise, a layer of dark cloudiness hovered above. Within a couple of minutes, the sun rise was limited by that cloudiness, and eventually I couldn't see the sunrise anymore. All I could see was clouds. I said to the Lord, "Is this foretelling of my day today? Are you saying, 'Remember I love you, bkz it is going to get difficult?'" He said, "All I'm saying is that sometimes, you can easily see My love & faithfulness, and other times, you need to just trust Me that it is there."

So as I came to work and things went nuts for the first 3 hours, I looked back and said, "Yes, He loves me. He chose me. He is still faithful . . . even when everything else is trying to distract me from that truth."

Will You Still Love Him?

2009-11-17T09:30:00.000-05:00

I had to contain myself. I had almost the entire chapter of Deuteronomy 8 posted here, and then realized that you all probably aren't as excited about it as I am. I encourage you to read the whole chapter if you are interested, especially verses 11-18. So a small bite . . . here are some of my favorite verses from my reading this morning in Deuteronomy.

Deuteronomy 8:2-3 "You shall remember all the way which the LORD your God has led you in the wilderness these forty years, that He might humble you, testing you, to know what was in your heart, whether you would keep His commandments or not. He humbled you and let you be hungry, and fed you with manna which you did not know, nor did your fathers know, that He might make you understand that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by everything that proceeds out of the mouth of the LORD."

The Lord is constantly trying to humble us. We think we do things, but we don't. We can't do anything without Him. These verses grabbed my attention when I got to He "let you be hungry . . . that He might make you understand that man does not live by bread alone, but man lives by everything that proceeds out of the mouth of the LORD." The Lord allowed the Israelites to be hungry so that they would know it isn't about physical food. He wanted to refine their character and make them more like Him.

So yes . . . it is all for our good . . . even going hungry. Will we trust that He is teaching us even when we don't have everything that we think we need? Will you still love & serve Him even if He lets you be hungry?

(In verses 11-18, He goes on and addresses this situation more including money.)

Learning about Humility

2009-11-16T13:24:00.000-05:00

I've been learning alot about my pride in case you haven't noticed from my previous postings. I spot pride quickly in people, bkz I hate my sin of pride, and I hate seeing it in other people as well. But it again becomes about me & my pride. "I see your pride . . . you better deal with it!" My attitude has been judgmental, tense, & divisive, not always outwardly but to myself. However, if unattended to, it will become outward.

People's pride comes out in controlling personalities, extreme insecurity, extremely opinionated, cockiness, etc. After spending some time processing how difficult it is to love people who are like this, the Lord reminded me of my struggle with pride, and how humility is the antithesis to pride. I've been praying for the Lord to teach me humility withouth humiliating me, and He has been so graciously doing so. (I'm so grateful!) As I sat in my car processing how I could deal with these people, and then being reminded of humility, I remembered back through my most recent interactions with difficult people, and the Lord showed me how I can be humble in those situations. He showed me that I need to speak less & listen more. When I visualized what it would look like with me not feeling the need to voice my opinion, disapproval, etc, I thought, that reminds me of how Jamie Work is. He is gentle, kind, peaceable. He doesn't always speak, when he certainly could . . . this is godly wisdom (James 3:17). This is very different from my judgmental & tense attitude. Then I looked up and saw the beginning of chapter 3, and realized it is all about controlling the tongue. When you control the tongue, you control the whole body! James 3:2 says, " . . .we all stumble in many ways. If anyone does not stumble in what he says, he is a perfect man, able to bridle the whole body as well."

I've been learning alot, so I know that this blog may not make as much sense to you as it does to me, but I wanted to share it. Our tongue gets us into alot of trouble, and if we can be humble & control our tongue, I can see why James calls him a "perfect man."

Its About Him

2009-11-12T09:29:00.000-05:00

I've been reading Colossians this week, and each morning, I'm brought back to how everything is about Christ. He is the head of the body. He is preeminent. Everything we do should be for Him. We should constantly look at things like He would look at things.

I struggle hard to do this somedays. Some days I win, some days I lose. Most days involve me winning some & losing some. As I struggle today , I realize it is bkz my eyes are on what I want, not what He wants. He wants my eyes on Him. I want my eyes on Him . . . but I want what I want too.

Lord help me to be willing to give up my desires in order to achieve what You have for me to do. Help me to be completely satisfied in You.

Romans 8:31-39 . . . one more time

2009-10-28T09:34:00.000-04:00

One of the verses in this passage that I usually gloss over is interesting . . . FOR YOUR SAKE WE ARE BEING PUT TO DEATH ALL DAY LONG; WE WERE CONSIDERED AS SHEEP TO BE SLAUGHTERED. This comes right after Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? Hold on . . . why are we being put to death all day long? What kind of love considers us as sheep to be slaughtered?

This passage used to be one of those sappy passages for me: "Oh!!! God loves me!!! Yea!!!" This is true, He does love me. He loves me so much that he refines me. He slaughters my flesh, so that I can live anew in Him, bkz He continues with . . .

But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

So He loves us . . . and absolutely nothing can separate us from His love which is available to us only bkz of Jesus Christ.

Back to Romans 8

2009-10-28T09:20:00.000-04:00

Last night, our small group was dissecting Romans 8:31-39. Romans 8 is one of my favorite chapters in Scripture (along with Philippians 4), so I was excited to cover this chapter in our small group.

What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us? He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things? Who will bring a charge against God's elect? God is the one who justifies; who is the one who condemns? Christ Jesus is He who died, yes, rather who was raised, who is at the right hand of God, who also intercedes for us. Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? Just as it is written, "FOR YOUR SAKE WE ARE BEING PUT TO DEATH ALL DAY LONG; WE WERE CONSIDERED AS SHEEP TO BE SLAUGHTERED." But in all these things we overwhelmingly conquer through Him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:31-39 (NASB)

It was the one of the same parts that usually sticks out to me, but in a different way. Who will separate us from the love of Christ? Will tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or peril, or sword? The first thought was, how could tribulation, distress, etc separate us from Christ's love? Does the fact that we have nothing to eat change the fact that God loves us? Then it clicked. No. It doesn't separate us from His love. But when we are in the pit of despair and things are going badly, we say "Why God? Why don't You care what I'm going through? Where are you?" He is right there with you!

He promises that no matter what you are going through is going to separate you from His love. You don't have to ask where is He! He is right there with you!!! He loves you!!!

. . . . more thoughts on this passage tomorrow . . .

Rejoice

2009-10-27T09:22:00.000-04:00

Philippians 4, especially vs 4-9, seems to always be on my heart. I guess bkz it is so outside of our box to rejoice in all things & be anxious about nothing. Things haven't been going so well the last several weeks, and I've been very anxious & depressed about them. I've been trying to pull myself out of this funk, but the more I try, the more deeply I descend into the pit of self-pity & such. Many times I go to Psalms when I'm feeling like this, but sometimes I go deeper into the funk when I'm in Psalms. Today, I needed a life preserver, not someone to associate with my griefs.

Remembering that Philippians is the book about joy, I opened it up. I read it the whole book, but since Philippians 4 has always been a favorite spot, I camped out there a little bit. Verse 5 has always seemed a bit out of place to me. I'm still not sure that I completely understand its place, but I think some light may have been shed on it today:

Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near.

In my anxiety & depressed mood, I've become irritable, short with people, unloving, etc, etc. I've been doing everything in my pain, but having a gentle spirit. So Paul says, Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice! I don't feel like rejoicing. Then Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near. But I don't have a gentle spirit. Then get one bkz the Lord is near!!! You should be contented & joyful bkz He is right here! So . . . Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.

God, Thank you for being near. I need your help to rejoice. I need your help to have a gentle spirit, but when I remember that You are near, it helps so much. Help me not to be anxious. Help me to seek hard after You on my knees being grateful for what You are going to do. Your peace will protect my mind & heart that get a bit out of control sometimes. Help me to focus on what is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, good repute, excellent, and worthy of praise not things that are anxiety provoking, fear-based, false, ugly, sinful, etc. Help me to rejoice, be gentle, & be at peace in Your arms.

Cliches

2009-10-21T19:30:00.000-04:00

Cliches drive me crazy, but unfortunately, they are cliches for a reason. Why? Bkz most of the time they are true or at based in truth. There are some Scripture verses that have become cliche:

For God so loved the world . . .
Trust in the Lord with all your heart . . .
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me . . .
But the one I think I hear the most is based in Romans 8:28: all things work together for good. I think I hear this one the most bkz even unbelievers essentially quote it when they say, "it will all work out for the best!" Not necessarily . . .

Look at Romans 8:28 (NASB) in its context. And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose. For those whom He foreknew, He also predestined to become conformed to the image of His Son, so that He would be the firstborn among many brethren; and these whom he predestined, He also called; and these whom He called, He also justified; and these whom He justified, He also glorified.

God causes all things to work together for who? For those who love God & are called. What is good? to be conformed to the image of His Son. It isn't necessarily happy or fun. Most people don't like the process of being conformed to the image of His Son. But those who love God and are called are content with the outcome of that process. So be careful where you throw this verse around. BUT, be encouraged! God makes all circumstances in the lives of those who love Him and are called, to make them more like Him. That is the goal of life to be like Christ & give Him all the glory.

Leviticus & Numbers

2009-10-19T21:08:00.000-04:00

I've not been posting much recently bkz I've been reading Leviticus & Numbers. It was really tough. I'm not finished with Numbers yet, but I'm about half way. I prayed several mornings for understanding. Why does God go into such great detail about how to build the tabernacle, how to transport it, endless numbers of laws? Why are women created to be "unclean" for a week every month? But then I realized that men are unclean often as well, maybe not for a week at a time, but pretty often.

These last 2 questions were the most intriguing to me. Then it hit me. People have said that all the lists of laws & such are reminding us how holy God is. I sort of understood, but when I really mulled over why God would declare women unclean for 12 months out of 52, He said, "Bkz you ARE unclean." We aren't worthy of Him. He is a holy God, and we in and of ourselves, are unclean. We can't truly know the Lord and understand salvation for all it is without realizing that we are unclean.

Hence the message of redemption. I love how even in the Torah tells us about the Gospel. All of those laws are just saying, "You can't possibly keep all of these laws. You are going to break some. You need a sacrifice to pay the penalty."

I think I forget how much I need a Savior too often. I think I do alot of things that "good Christians" do. I go to church, read my bible, pray, etc. So what do I need forgiveness for? Alot of things, but lets start with just bkz I'm human . . .

Life from Death

2009-10-15T16:42:00.001-04:00

It is interesting how so many things in Scripture defy what we commonly believe. Things like "he who is least among you all--he is the greatest" (Lk 9:48). The one that I've been learning the most is how life comes from death. Things have to die in order for other things to live. A seed has to die in order to produce more fruit. Christ had to die in order for us to have an opportunity at life. We have to die to ourselves in order to have life in Christ.

The unfortunate reality is that we all fight death. We do whatever we can to avoid it. We'll do whatever we can do to keep something alive whether a business, organization, church, etc, but sometimes God's will is for it to die, so new life can come from it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that we should all commit suicide & die. But, one day we are all going to die physically, and what an amazing life lies beyond for those of us who know Him! We'll live forever! So start now, "die" to yourself and live completely for the Lord.

Why God?

2009-10-12T18:20:00.000-04:00

There are many times that we don't understand what is going on in our lives, and I find myself asking God why? The question comes often, but I'm rarely left wanting as I'm assured in Psalm 23:1 "The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want." I can't completely understand God (Romans 11:34, "Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been His counselor?"), so don't fool yourself that you are going to understand with a finite mind what the Lord is doing. However, I've found that the more I seek Him, the more I look to Him, the more I see how He has done things in Scripture, the more I am in His word, the less I argue with Him . . . whether I understand or not.

1. Why does God allow a 4 year old to get 3rd degree burns on her leg? 2. Why does God take a mom from a 13 year old girl and her family? 3. Why does God allow people to go long periods of time without work? 4. Why does God seem to be silent sometimes? 5. Why does God allow people to be abused by their parents or anyone? 6. Why does God allow marriages to dissolve? 7. Why does God allow people to be raped? Can I answer any of these questions? Not exactly, but the more I know the Lord, the more I can understand a bit more.

Here are some things that I've learned throughout my life some from personal experience, some vicariously. 1. So a small child can be saved by her brother & begin to understand unconditional love . . . something that originated with God, and thus can only point to Him. (John 15:13). 2. To take away a child's idol and bring a family to a point of desperation that we can only seek after Him for true healing (among 1000s of other things). If I could tell you the stories about that one! 3. So we learn that we don't provide for ourselves, the Lord is the One who provides. To increase our faith. 4. To increase my faith in what is true. Even when He is silent, we need to trust that He is who He says He is & believe. Will I believe even when I don't see or hear Him. 5. To understand that only the Lord loves perfectly, and we are all searching after Him. 6. Again to understand that the Lord is the only one who loves perfectly & completely. Humans can't be a substitute for God. He is to be the only God in our life. To understand that we are only completely fulfilled in Him. 7. To understand what God did when He forgave us. To understand that only God loves perfectly.

I could go on and on, and I've not completely answered any of these. So my goal isn't to make anyone angry at my very simplistic answers. But we are here to bring glory to God. Everything is here for the purpose of bringing Him glory. We need to be able to know Him well enough that we can see outside of ourselves and our pain, and see the only One who can truly bring healing.

Stop the Madness!

2009-10-06T09:52:00.000-04:00

I had a student the other day ask me how to stop thinking too much. He is constantly thinking, and thinking again, and over thinking some more, and analyzing everything. It was driving him mad! It was one of those moments that I just wasn't sure how to answer him, and I just shot up what my colleague calls a "flare prayer," truly having no idea how to respond to him. The next thing that happened was pretty amazing. It has happened a few times in my life, and I just stand in awe after it happens. A word came out of my mouth. My mouth moved. My vocal chords vibrated, but it wasn't me saying the word. "Trust" is all that came out of my mouth. At first, I panicked wondering, "what just happened, what did I say, and was it true?!?!" It took only 2 seconds to return to a state of peace as God quickly helped me understand what He just used me to say.

I am so important in my life that it is up to me to fix and solve everything. When I trust, there is a sense of overwhelming peace & rest. My mind isn't in overdrive anymore.

The student & I weren't communicating well until this point, so I was pretty frustrated, but after that word came out of my mouth, we both stopped and pondered. The Lord spoke, and we were both pondering the amazing truth that we have to trust or we'll drive ourselves mad!

2009-10-01T09:05:00.000-04:00

This morning, I was sitting out on my front porch swing wrapped in a blanket bkz it is starting to get cool here in the mornings! I just wanted to be still for a few minutes before I began to read. I heard hundreds of birds chirping. You know, the sound that for those of us who have seen Alfred Hitchcock's The Birds causes us to want to run inside at the sound bkz we have been classically conditioned to fear that sound! Anyway, since I'm talking about learning (classical conditioning), I've learned by association that when I hear that sound, it triggers a memory of sitting in a Bryan College chapel a few years ago. Forgive me bkz the details won't be exactly accurate, but you'll get the gist. A missionary came to tell us about his ministry in South America. He led a witch doctor to the Lord. The witch doctor's specialty was being able to interpret the noises that animals made into English. As the missionary & the former witch doctor were talking one day, they heard a bunch of birds, and the missionary curiously asked, "When you were a witch doctor, what did you hear the birds saying?" The former witch doctor smiled, and said, "Glory to God in the Highest! Blessed be the Lord!" (Now the quote of the interpretation may not be exact, but the point is, the birds were praising God!). So I think of that story all the time when I hear birds chirping. I like that reaction a little better than the reaction I used to have from The Birds.

It was interesting too, that all of a sudden the chirping stopped in unison. I wonder if they were having church up there and they had all just been singing praise together! The song was over ;)

The Exodus

2009-09-29T11:04:00.000-04:00

It is always amazing to me as I read about the Lord leading his people out of Egypt. A couple of things stood out to me today.

1. They didn't just go to the Promised Land from Egypt. God led them way out of the way. I looked at a map this morning, and it would be like me driving to Pennsylvania from Tennessee by way of Florida, but they got distracted in Georgia so it took a long time. (I don't know about mileage, but I'm speaking in directional terms.) God had a lot more to teach them. From what I've read, the journey should have taken them less than a month. It took them 40 years! God wants me to learn some things on the way, so He doesn't usually take me the shortest way. He takes me the way that I'll learn the most. And it seems that the more I refuse to learn the longer it takes!

2. They saw the Red Sea part for them, and it lasted many hours. For about 1 million people, plus thousands of Egyptian soldiers to pass through, it didn't take a few minutes. They watched the Lord hold the walls of the sea back for hours. Yet a few days later, they whine to him about not having anything to drink, and then eat. When He gives them food, they complain about the food. Instead of being grateful, they complain. Sounds like me! [Side note, the description of manna must have been the first "astronaut food." It is a "fine flake like thing, fine as frost on the ground" yet "It was like coriander seed, white, and the taste of it was like wafers made with honey." (Ex.16:14, 31 ESV) That's a lot of flavor in something as fine as frost! :)]

3. Rememberances. God knows us. He knows we are terrible at remembering, so He was always instructing them to remember how He took care of them. I think it is so good to reflect back on what the Lord has been doing in our lives, so that we don't get discouraged by what is in front of us. If we remember how the Lord is good, we won't be deceived by the devil's lies that tell us He isn't good.

Prayer

2009-09-28T10:18:00.000-04:00

The Lord has really been trying to teach me about prayer this year, and I'm fighting it. I'm not sure why I'm fighting it. There is nothing more helpful & God centered than prayer. Yet, I struggle so much to pray. I think there is an air of mystery around prayer. There are so many verses that are so confusing about it. Pray without ceasing (I Thess. 5:17). If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer. (Matt. 21:22). There are 3 places in John (14-16) where Jesus says whatever you ask for in my name, it will be given to you. You ask and do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, so that you may spend it on your pleasures. (James 4:3). There are multiple other verses on prayer, and yet, we pray but we don't get what we ask for. Apparently, we ask with wrong motives. I wish I knew how to be selfless and totally God centered. These verses would be true then. God doesn't give me whatever I pray for bkz I ask self-centeredly. His goal isn't my desires, but His glory. If I can keep that in mind, it helps.

But how do we pray then? Why do we pray, when God has a plan and is sovereign anyway? Do we really change God? I saw The Shadowlands which is CS Lewis' story, and I remember him saying, "I don't pray bkz it changes God, I pray bkz it changes me." I think prayer helps align me with what God wants. It gets me on the same page with Him, so that I can see the world from His perspective more easily. It gets me out of the fallenness of this world for a few minutes, and takes me before His throne.

Prayer is still hard bkz it is so unnatural, and those of us with full blown or even ADHD tendencies don't concentrate well. Satan doesn't want us to pray, so he throws everything at us when we start. It shows that we are dependent on a sovereign & all powerful God.

I want to know what it would be like to be totally devoted to the Lord in prayer. I think my life would be considerably different. Lord, help me to be a disciple devoted to prayer.

Just Get Me Through God!

2009-09-23T13:14:00.001-04:00

I've had this conversation with a couple of people already today . . . I think God is trying to refresh my memory & perspective. It is one of the things I love about being a counselor. God uses His truth in my life, as I share it with other people. There is something very powerful about speaking God's truth outloud. The thief hears it, the demons hear it, God hears it, and most importantly, we hear it.

Today's truth? Don't just survive. Flourish! Life many times seems to overwhelm us, and I beg God, "Please just get me through today!" He desires to do so much more than just "get us through!" The thief wants us to drag through the day and barely survive. God wants us to give Him all the honor & glory. When we focus on the overwhelming number of things we have to do today, we lose our focus on Him. So stay focused on the Lord, and ask Him to help you flourish today!

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly. John 10:10 (NASB)

What does it mean to "feel" loved by God?

2009-09-22T09:18:00.000-04:00

I attended the American Association of Christian Counselors World Conference last week in Nashville @ the Opryland Hotel, so if you were wondering why I didn't post much last week, there is your reason. John Piper spoke on Wednesday night, and of course, I could have gone home when he was finished speaking. He gives such deep truths, that I'm still processing it! All of the quotations in this blog are from Piper's message. If you want the manuscript of Piper's message, the link is below. If the link doesn't work, just go to www.desiringgod.org & search: Beholding Glory & Becoming Whole: Seeing and Savoring God as the Heart of Mental Health. I had to put spaces in it in order for it all to fit on the blog: http://www.desiringgod.org/ResourceLibrary/Conference
Messages/ByConference/35/4216_Beholding_Glory_and_
Becoming_Whole_Seeing_and_Savoring_God_as_the_
Heart_of_Mental_Health/

There are so many things that he said, but I want to focus in on one thing. "We are spring-loaded in our sin to feel loved only if God endorses our desire to be made much of . . . 'Christ died for me to make much of me. He rescued me while undeserving to make much of me. He forgave me to make much of me. He removed his wrath to make much of me.' Oh how gloriously good this feels! What a precious gospel! " Yes, it is, but is that what He is doing? Did He do all of those things for me? I hate to burst my own bubble, but not really . . . Yes, He did do it for me, but His purpose was for His glory.

So "feeling loved by God means feeling glad that God not only crushed his Son for me, but that he is now crushing every vestige of desire in my life that competes with the pleasure of the praise of the glory of his grace . . . This transforming experience of being loved by God with his God-centered love is so unnatural to fallen humans, it takes supernatural power everyday to experience it."

We constantly think it is all about me, but it isn't. It is all about Him. No wonder we don't experience abundant life. Abundant life comes from loving Him not us.

And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we have seen his glory, glory as of the only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth. . . . And from his fullness we have all received, grace upon grace. John 1:14-16

God's Perspective

2009-09-21T09:03:00.000-04:00

Life can be really frustrating and wearisome. I've been reading through Genesis, and the last two days, I've been reading about Joseph. He was mocked for being the "favorite" child. He was thrown in a pit and then sold as a slave. He was set up by Potiphar's wife. He did everything he could to avoid her advances, but as he ran, he left his shirt with her so that she couldn't get him. He was put in prison, and the people he helped while in prison forgot about him for 2 years. Finally things begin to turn around for him.

This isn't the first time I've read Joseph's story, so as I'm reading the story, I feel myself not all that upset about what Joseph is experiencing. Imagine what Joseph must have felt like sitting in a pit, or in prison, or being set up by Potiphar's wife, or being forgotten by the cupbearer & baker. He could have easily settled into self-pity. But he was patient & waited on the Lord. I'm sure there were days where he battled self-pity, but he didn't get angry or ruin his testimony or anything like that. He was patient. Why wasn't I upset about what he was experiencing? Bkz I know the end of the story. I'm not trying to be irreverent, but I felt like God in a way, bkz I could see things from His perspective for once. I knew that in a couple of chapters (or years :)) that Joseph was going to be 2nd in command in Egypt. I knew that God had good things planned. I could see it. Genesis 50:20, "You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives."

I wish I could see it in my own life, but I can't. So again, I must learn to trust Him. Help me to always be taking Your perspective, God!

Loving & Forgiving Others

2009-09-16T11:54:00.001-04:00

It is really hard to love some people some days. Some people just drive me up a wall. I was talking to a someone about learning to forgive, and I brought up the verse in the Sermon on the Mount: Matthew 5:43-48 "You have heard that it was said, 'Love your neighbor and hate your enemy.' But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. If you love those who love you, what reward will you get? Are not even the tax collectors doing that? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect." I made it red bkz Jesus was speaking :)

The Lord made it pretty clear to me that one of the first steps in forgiveness is being able to pray for the person. The Lord changes your heart as you pray for them. He commands us to do that in these verses. I know some people are hard to love, but the unsaved love the people who are easy to love. The Lord calls us to the next level: Love everyone, even the people who aren't kind to us.

So love the person who is condescending to you. Love the person who mocks you. Love the person who spits in your face. Love the person that uses & abuses you. Jesus did in Luke 23:34: Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing." Pray that the Lord will help you to see them like He sees them. When you try to see them as the Lord does, you see a scared, sinful person trying to find peace & value. It should help you pity them some . . . which helps you forgive them some.

Grace in Genesis

2009-09-15T09:10:00.000-04:00

You know it is interesting . . . many times we look at the Old Testament and talk about how we see the "judging" side of God, and that is true. We do see God destroying alot of people & being aggressively angry towards sin. But as I read through Genesis, the Lord is showing me His grace as well. Grace is undeserved . . .

Abram & Isaac both lied to leaders about their wives telling the leaders that their wives were their sisters. Yet, the leaders are the ones that got punished, and Abram & Isaac were both given much wealth because of it.

Jacob tricked Esau out of his birthright & Isaac out of Esau's blessing. Yet Jacob is the one who receives the birthright, the blessing, and becomes a very wealthy & blessed man of God.

We need to remember that God never changes. He was just as gracious then as now. He will continue to be gracious to as well. He also hates sin. Always has, and always will. So be grateful for His grace, and flee sin.

Lowly & Humble

2009-09-11T12:16:00.000-04:00

I find it interesting that there is a common thread of God using the unqualified, uneducated, outcasts, lowest of society, etc. He chose 12 disciples that were uneducated (Acts 4:13) and couldn't make it as normal disciples of other Rabbis in that day. He chose to go to have lunch with tax collectors, gluttons, sinners, drunkards, instead of the religious people. What is the deal with Israel? It is ugly land that is far from valuable except to be a route to the sea, and yet nations haven't ceased to war over it. Jesus chose a donkey to ride into Jerusalem on. They knew He was the King, and yet He rode in on a donkey . . . no horse, no chariot, a donkey.

People complain about having a low self-esteem. The truth is, they love themselves alot! If they didn't love themselves alot, then they wouldn't be so worried about how they feel about themselves & how others perceive them! Jesus tells us that we love ourselves (Mark 12:33). If we are humble, the Lord will use us. He can't use the proud, that is why he opposes them (I Peter 5:5). He uses the humble.

So don't tell God that He can't use you or you aren't worthy. Let Him decide who is valuable & usable. My favorite quote is my Helmut Thielicke: God does not love us because we are so valuable; we are valuable because God loves us. He is the One Who gives us value, not us!

Beauty from Ashes

2009-09-10T08:54:00.000-04:00

This morning around 4:30am was when my mom died 19 years ago. It was a horrible day, and I remember every detail like it happened yesterday. Those of you who knew me then, know that I became a very angry & bitter teenager. As I look back, I remember many people who did so much for me to help me cope & heal, and I'm so grateful for their tireless (but never unnoticed) work.

I was counseling a student the other day, and we were talking about a great loss in their life. After that appointment, God has brought to mind the many things that I didn't understand then (when my mom died), but now they are crystal clear. Who knows really why the Lord took my mom at that time, but He obviously saw it as best for all involved. Over the last 19 years, He has been showing me small benefits to the timing of her death. I would never have left home if she was still alive. I would have never pursued counseling as a career. I would have never met Miles. I would have never been stretched spiritually as I have been over the last 10 years. I wouldn't be where I am in my relationship with God. That in and of itself is enough explanation for me . . . the peace & joy that come from knowing the Lord well is indispensible to my life. I think her death was the first in a chain of events that took me to where I am. PTL!!! I'm so grateful for where the Lord has brought me.

Romans 8:28 is absolutely true: All things work together for the good of those who love Him . . .

Without Faith . . .

2009-09-09T14:27:00.000-04:00

I was reading about Noah & the Flood this morning. It is such a familiar story.

I wonder how much mockery Noah endured while he was building a boat. It had never rained before. I wonder when the faith became easier. Did it get easier when 2 of every kind of animal & 7 of every kind of clean animal got on the boat? Did it get easier when the rain actually started to fall? I wonder what it was like to be in a boat with all of those animals for about 6 months? I wonder what it smelled like? I wonder how the animals got along. I mean was it millenium like? Were the lions living at peace with their prey? Were the animals of prey on separate floors? What was it like when Noah sent out a dove & it returned with no hope of land? Did they all wonder if they were going to die on that boat? The relief that must have come when it returned the 2nd time with an olive branch.

I noticed some new things this time. First of all, Noah was 500 years old when his children were born. The dude was old no matter what time you put him in! I also noticed that Noah was an incredible man of faith as I alluded to some in the previous paragraph. He had to have been mocked while he was building the boat. Seriously God, you are going to bring all of those animals to me and then it is going to rain? What water is going to fall from the sky? Oh to have been there when the animals started showing up. You want me to live on a boat with all of these animals? How are You going to feed them? How are You going to take care of us all? Is it ever going to stop raining? It rained for over a month straight!! (And I complain if it rains a couple of days in a row!). How depressing to look out the window of the boat, see only sky & water, and know that everything is dead except those on the boat (I suppose except for the water animals.). Or what a realization of your faith to know that the Lord saved you. What relief to see God lead and answer them! The olive branch, the dry land, the rainbow . . . Noah's family had a crazy year!

As I was pondering all of this, I remembered that Noah is mentioned in the "Faith Chapter" in Hebrews 11. I went to find it, and read this in verse 6 just before I got to Noah: And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

Without faith . . . it is IMPOSSIBLE to please him. Where is my faith? I'll be honest. It has been almost invisible the last few weeks, but today's passage increased my faith. Lord, help me to have faith, bkz without it, I can't please You.

God has a Sense of Humor

2009-09-07T17:59:00.000-04:00

So I woke up today feeling better which makes everything seem a little better even though I had a 13 hour work day ahead of me. I read Ps. 146-150 which basically says over & over again . . . "Praise the Lord!" So I sit thinking, and said to God, "Well, I guess you want me to praise You!" (I'm quick, I know!) So I decided that I would try to praise God every hour of the day. Now, it is already late in the day, and I didn't do very well on the challenge, but I think it is bkz the first 30 minutes were the biggest struggle for me. I won that battle, but didn't do so well the rest of the day.

One of the biggest stressors for me right now is money . . . we are just struggling so much financially, but trying to learn that God takes care of us . . . we don't take care of us. So I had just stated that I wanted to try to praise God every hour today intentionally, and 30 minutes later I got pulled over by a State Trooper on my way to work . . . which . . . it's labor day . . . if only I'd had off like everyone else. Oh well, I won't exchange my fall, summer, Christmas, & spring breaks for Labor day! :) So yes . . . I got a ticket . . . and bkz it is labor day, no one is answering the phone at the Meigs County Court Clerk's office so they can't tell me the damage yet. The trooper said that he couldn't tell me what the amount is bkz the counties have been getting frustrated with them charging too much or not enough ... so they leave it to the county. That could be good or bad . . . we'll hopefully find out tomorrow!

ANYWAY . . . As I'm sitting in my car waiting for a very polite trooper to write me a ticket (bkz I got a warning a long time ago, and I've never been extended more mercy by the police departments to get another one though my husband has been extended mercy on a number of occasions bkz he knows all the police officers! Even though I'm jealous, I'm still relieved bkz we can't afford these tickets!), I heard God say, "Are you praising Me?" "Are you serious God? You want me to praise You when I'm getting a ticket to add to my mounting bills?" "Yes." "Okay . . . I praise You God for allowing me to get this ticket. Why? Bkz I'll slow down, maybe you are keeping me from a fatal accident at some point. Maybe You just want to show off that You are the One Who provides, not me. Who knows . . . but You have a purpose, and in that . . . I'll praise You." And I've had a remarkably great day . . . It happens pretty often when I submit to His will.

Finally . . . Some Rest

2009-09-04T12:07:00.001-04:00

This week has been a continual battle for contentment, strength, and joy. This morning, I am there (at least more so than earlier this week). Yes, some of it is that it is Friday, but more of it is allowing the Lord's truth to continue to sink in. I think sometimes He is quiet just to know if we will seek hard after Him when it doesn't feel like He is there. We need to trust that He is, bkz He said He is, not bkz we feel Him.

Psalm 139:4-6: "Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether. You hem me in behind and before, and lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it."

Verse 5 was especially encouraging today. He knows what has happened, what is happening, and what will happen . . . it is all in His hands. We don't need to worry. He loves us. He is in control. He isn't worried. He knows how it is all going to work out.

The Battle Rages

2009-09-03T09:27:00.000-04:00

Still battling my pride . . . my pride makes me miserable! And well it should . . .

My pride is surfacing as I want certain things for my life and the Lord isn't giving them to me. How dare He! How dare the Lord of the Universe, King of Kings, Who knows past, present, & future, and loves me more than I could ever ask or imagine, not take my advice as to what I think is best for me . . . I'm such a measly peon . . . How dare I think I know better than He!

John 12:25 The man who loves his life will lose it, while the man who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life.

Waiting

2009-09-02T09:05:00.000-04:00

Point of Grace has a song on one of their earlier albums called Steady On. The chorus says:
"We run up ahead, we lag behind you
It's hard to wait when heaven's on our mind
Teach our restless feet to walk beside you
Cause in our hearts we're already gone
Will you walk with us
Steady on"

This song comes to mind often because I feel like I'm holding the Lord's hand trying to stay in step with Him, but as a small child, I'm constantly running ahead in excitement or impatience OR I'm lagging behind in fear or apathy. It is so hard to stay in step with Him. But His timing in perfect, and when the time is right, all will be well. We must wait on the Lord.

Psalm 130:6-7: My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning. O Israel, put your hope in the LORD, for with the LORD is unfailing love and with him is full redemption.

Psalm 121

2009-09-01T09:15:00.000-04:00

I will lift up my eyes to the mountains;
From where shall my help come?
My help comes from the LORD,
Who made heaven and earth.
He will not allow your foot to slip;
He who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, He who keeps Israel
Will neither slumber nor sleep.
The LORD is your keeper;
The LORD is your shade on your right hand.
The sun will not smite you by day,
Nor the moon by night.
The LORD will protect you from all evil;
He will keep your soul.
The LORD will guard your going out and your coming in
From this time forth and forever.

Do I need to say anything else?

Peace

2009-08-31T16:56:00.000-04:00

You know, some days I wake up & I just want to scream or give up bkz everything seems to be going nuts & nothing is going right . . . today was one of those days.

I was reading Psalm 119, such a great chapter of encouragement. It is all about the Word of God. It restores, it rejuvenates, it strengthens, it encourages . . . and on and on it goes. So I just want to leave you with one verse: 165 Those who love Your law have great peace, And nothing causes them to stumble.

The best way to know the Lord is to spend time in His Word . . . so let's love His word . . . that is where peace is.

The Giver vs. the Gift

2009-08-28T12:17:00.001-04:00

This morning I was feeling very frustrated that nothing seemed to be going right for me. I've been begging God for a few things in my life, and yet nothing seems to be coming to fruition. I was feeling hopeless & frustrated. I sat on the front porch to begin my quiet time, and there was a steady rain falling. I opened my Bible to Ps. 103 (can you tell I'm reading through the book?).

Bless the LORD, O my soul, and all that is within me, bless His holy name. Bless the LORD, O my soul, and forget none of His benefits; Who pardons all your iniquities, Who heals all your diseases; Who redeems your life from the pit, Who crowns you with lovingkindness and compassion; Who satisfies your years with good things, so that your youth is renewed like the eagle. (NASB)

"Yeah right God" was my first self-centered thought, but the Lord didn't give up on me. I kept reading, and I was reminded of what God does for me . . . all good things (James 1:17). And I was reminded that a few verses earlier in James 1:2, He encourages me to "consider it . . . all joy when you encounter various trials." I was also reminded that He takes care of all my needs, not just the physical ones. HE is all I need. He provides me with peace, love, mercy, forgiveness, etc.

I got to Ps. 104:27-29 They all wait for You to give them their food in due season. You give to them, they gather it up; You open Your hand, they are satisfied with good. You hide Your face, they are dismayed; You take away their spirit, they expire and return to their dust. He gives us the things that I think I give to myself: my house, my job, my food, my breathe, my spirit, His face.

So I walked away realizing that I'm craving the gifts more than the Giver. Lord, help me to crave after Your face, not after what You will give to me.

Seeking the Lord

2009-08-27T10:25:00.000-04:00

Here is a quote from John Piper's article, What Does it Mean to Seek the Lord (www.desiringgod.org).

"Seeking involves calling and pleading. O Lord, open my eyes. O Lord, pull back the curtain of my own blindness. Lord, have mercy and reveal yourself. I long to see your face.
The great obstacle to seeking the Lord is pride. “In the pride of his face the wicked does not seek him” (Psalm 10:4). Therefore, humility [emphasis mine] is essential to seeking the Lord.The great promise to those who seek the Lord is that he will be found. “If you seek him, he will be found by you” (1 Chronicles 28:9). And when he is found, there is great reward. “Whoever would draw near to God must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who seek him” (Hebrews 11:6). God himself is our greatest reward."

Oh, how arrogant of me to think that if I do certain things that I will find the Lord. If I read enough Scripture, listen to enough sermons, go to church enough times, share the Gospel with enough people, pray long enough. Not that these things are bad, but if our motive is for "me to find God" it may not be effective. It is all about Him. He is the one who has to remove the blinders from our eyes, and if I'm being proud or depending on myself to find the Lord, I'm not going to find Him. So Lord, continue to teach me humility (preferably without humiliation!).

Humility

2009-08-25T20:39:00.001-04:00

God has been showing me how prideful I am over the last year or so. The antithesis of pride is humility, so I figure that the best way to fight pride is to learn to be humble. So I've been asking God to show me how to be humble without having to be humiliated. He has graciously obliged. It doesn't make the inner struggle any easier, but it certainly helps me save face (bkz my pride couldn't handle the humiliation!).

So I was confronted with a situation yesterday that was not correct in my opinion. I wanted so badly to correct it bkz I should have gotten more recognition out of it. To bring the mistake to someone's attention would have been feeding my pride, so I had to let it go. I could feel the intensity of the battle in my soul as I contemplated the sitaution. A couple of people even pointed out that it was wrong, I should have been treated differently. I wanted to scream, "Yes!!! Someone notices! How dare this mistake be made against me!! I should hunt down the person who made the error & rectify the situation." I'm still battling it to be honest. But lucky for me, God gave me some time to sit & ponder the situation. I begged the Lord to show me what perspective I should have. All I kept hearing was I Peter 5:5b-7 (ESV) Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for God is opposed to the proud but gives grace to the humble. Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you." So how do I humble myself God? I'm trying!

And Philippians 2:1-11 came to mind: "So if there is any encouragement in Christ, any comfort from love, any participation in the Spirit, any affection and sympathy, complete my joy by being of the same mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one mind. Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross. Therefore God has highly exalted him and bestowed on him the name that is above every name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

So as I pondered that Jesus didn't make sure that He was counted equal with God when He is God, but was only concerned about the glory of God the Father . . . I was strangely humbled.

God's Will for Your Life

2009-08-25T10:33:00.000-04:00

I first want to apologize for being MIA for the last week. I missed doing these blogs. Writing these blogs have kept me focused on the Lord. It is so easy for me to forget what my quiet time was about if I don't process it by writing it out in this blog. Which leads me into focusing on the Lord each day and really thinking about what He is trying to teach us.

Yesterday was a bit of a yuck kind of day, and I realized that I got so caught up in the busyness, that I didn't allow the Word to penetrate my life. When I have to really process what the Lord is teaching me in my quiet time in order to write a blog about it, it really sticks with me much more during the day.

An important part of my quiet time is a time of expressing my greatfulness to God. It takes my sometimes negative attitude and focuses it on the positive. This morning I had to give a little devotional to all the new psychology majors, and I talked about being greatful to the Lord. We are always asking what is the Lord's will, and it is clearly spelled out in I Thessalonians 5:16-18: Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

Shine Like Stars

2009-08-18T13:47:00.000-04:00

As Charles Swindoll says in his little pamplet entitled, Attitude (loosely quoted), "Life is 10% what happens to us, and 90% how we respond to it." This is why siblings can live through the same events, and their lives can take very different turns. This is why someone can loose their job and be at peace, while someone else can loose their pen and be angry for a week! It is all about how you choose to respond to negative (or positive for that matter) circumstances.

I chose to be negative and have a bad attitude about an event that I had to go to. I whined to a few people, who mostly empathized with me and my bad attitude spread. The Lord convicted me, and I prayed for a good attitude. I knew a good attitude about this event wasn't coming of my own initiative. At the event, the Lord gave me grace, and I was able to be fairly positive. I was surprised at how many people had a bad attitude at the event. I had to fight to not just sink into complaining again. In fact, the Lord showed me just how ugly the complaining was to Him as I watched others complain, and as I fought against going down that road again. It was really refreshing to run into an occasional good attitude, adnd the Lord reminded me of His Word:

"Do everything without complaining or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing." Phil. 2:14-16 (NIV).

I've noticed that people stick out when they are really positive about something . . . they shine like stars. I want to shine like a star for the Lord, so I'll need to nip my complaining in the bud. It is a tough battle, but one that not only pleases the Lord, but gives you a better perspective in life.

Lead Me to the Rock, where I'll Sit under the Shelter of His Wings

2009-08-17T10:17:00.000-04:00

When it rains, it pours. I have a mug that says, "When you pray for rain, be prepared for the mud." I've been praying for God to teach me humility kindly, bkz being taught humility could be humiliating! :) I know that my pride is a big problem for me, and I want to learn to be humble.

Well this week is the busiest of the semester at work (as far as the number of things that need to get done & the number of workdays and nights that take place). Most of it isn't too stressful, it is just alot. I have some other things going on in my life that are in limbo, and this is the week that many of them will hopefully cease to be in limbo. I'm not sleeping very well, and I'm waking up with a list in my head. I'm trying to let God take it, but I'm apparently doing something wrong, bkz the more I try to let God take it, the more stressed I get. I guess I'm not doing a very good job of resting. So this may be how the Lord is teaching me to rest, as I came to work knowing I only have 3 hours this morning to get some work done before faculty workshop begins, and my computer is on the fritz. This blog will probably look weird just bkz it really isn't letting me format much.

So this morning, as I'm sitting on my porch swing begging for peace, the Lord reminds me of His care for me.
Psalm 61:1-4 Hear my cry, O God, listen to my prayer; from the end of the earth I call to you when my heart is faint. Lead me to the rock that is higher than I, for you have been my refuge, a strong tower against the enemy. Let me dwell in your tent forever! Let me take refuge under the shelter of your wings!

So I'm climbing to the Rock to sit under His sheltering wings. The storm will be over soon.

It is All for His Glory

2009-08-14T14:21:00.000-04:00

This entry may seem a bit scattered . . . but hang with me . . .

A friend of mine's 5 year old asked him, "If God wants everything to be for his glory, why isn't that selfish?" What a great question. It is amazing what children understand.

His response to her (though probably not word for word): 1. He has the right to receive glory from all that He has made because HE made it. 2. For God to really love us He must have us pursue that which will make us the most happiest. Himself. It is for our joy that we glorify God.3. Self-exaltation is a virtue for God. For all others it is evil. He is worthy of glory and we are not. (Stolen from Shannon Brown's facebook page . . . thanks Shannon!) :)

Last week, I was about to cross the Tennessee River on my way home from work when an unknown object crashed into my windshield. It left quite the crack, as well as sent my heart racing. I was a bit frustrated wondering what else could possibly happen this week as I called my husband. He is so good for me bkz he just said, "no problem . . . we'll get it taken care of. The Lord isn't surprised by it." My heartrate quickly slowed, as I realized he was right. As I'm driving home though, I'm wondering, "Why didn't He just stop it from happening?" But in all reality, I wouldn't have known to be thankful if it hadn't happened. He proceeded to give me a brand new windshield for $0. No deductible? Is that even possible in today's world? Who cares if it is possible in today's world! The Lord is an expert in the impossible.

Why did the item come crashing into my windshield? Hard to tell, but it looks like the Lord received glory from it. It seems selfish for Him to put us through the whole process just for Him to get the glory; I understand why my friend's 5 year old asked the question. But we are here for His glory, and I'm never happier than I watch the Lord work. He can do exceeding abundantly more than we could ever ask or imagine . . . and it is all for His glory.

Cease Striving

2009-08-13T10:34:00.000-04:00

One of my favorite verses has always been "Be still and know that I am God" (Ps. 46:10). I've read it in the NASB many times before, but for some reason the translation struck me today.

The last 2 weeks have been way too crazy. I'm absolutely exhausted from fighting the anxiety and stress. This morning when I came across Ps. 46:10 in the NASB, I read "Cease striving and know that I am God." I have been working so hard to make things work out like I want them to work out. Surely God needs my help, right? Wrong! So this morning as I sat on my porch swing and looked out at the foggy morning (which is how my brain felt as well), I surrendered it all to Him again. I have to do that daily or I'll just pick it all up again!

So stop striving . . . trust the Lord . . . He is God; we aren't!

Smile God Loves You

2009-08-12T11:34:00.000-04:00

I really don't like the cliche bumper stickers: Trust God. Let go & let God. Jesus Loves You. Just have faith. They really tend to get on my nerves, not bkz they are false, but bkz they are cliche. People say them without really understanding the depth of what they are saying. So when I'm talking with someone (whether myself :) or someone else) and I say "You have to trust Him." I can feel the roll of the eyes if I can't see it. I can hear their thoughts, "Yes, yes . . . trust God. I know. I know. Such a church answer. Give me some real help." The reality is these things are true, and they are difficult to believe.

I didn't really begin to understand God's love for me until I met the man that I married. I always felt (I didn't say it was true, I said I felt) that love was based on what I did. I had to earn it. But God freely loves us (Romans 5:8). He loves us more than we could ever imagine. Miles just loved me as unconditionally as humanly possible, and that helped me begin to understand how much the Lord loves me . . . and you!

So now, I pay attention to the little ways as well as the big ways that God loves me. His ultimate act of love was sending His only Son to pay the price for my sin. He reminds me every day that He loves me with things like the fog rising among the mountains, the ocean, a fall day, the rain, the stars in a vast dark sky, the sun on my face, the wind in my hair, a field of sunflowers, etc. Two of my favorites are watching the full moon rise over the ocean or watching the sun rise over the Tennessee River on my way to work. God could have made the world boring, but He loves us.

On my way to work the other day, I saw another similar pet peeve of mine . . . cliches on a church marquee. It said, "Smile God Loves You", but this time I actually smiled . . . knowing the depth of that statement.

I Hate Religion

2009-08-11T10:02:00.000-04:00

Jesus spoke out often against religion. Religion is one of those things that Satan did. He took something true & twisted it. He capitalized on our pride, and we have religion. The Pharisees were the people that Jesus condemned the most, yet they were the most religious people of the day. I love this quote from Tim Keller.

“Religion is, ‘I obey, therefore I’m accepted’. The Gospel is, ‘I’m accepted through what Jesus Christ has done for me, therefore I obey’. Religion gives you control, that’s why its so popular…If I am saved by what I can do, then there’s a limit to what God can ask of me. I still have some control. But if I am saved by sheer grace, then there’s nothing He cannot ask of me”.

It is always about me. What can I do? How can God use me? What will people think of me if I don't ... (you fill in the blank: go to church, am around those people, etc.)? Jesus obviously didn't care what people thought. They thought He was a drunkard & a glutton bkz He was around sinners. We as Christians isolate ourselves from the lost afraid of being contaminated or something. But how are we to reach the lost if we aren't around them? Jesus came to seek and save the lost not the people who thought they were good enough or the people who didn't see their need for the Savior (Matt. 9:9-13). Do you see your need for the Savior or are you doing everything you can?

The Problem of Me

2009-08-10T09:37:00.000-04:00

I've been learning over the last couple of years how incredibly self-centered I am, and how God is opposed to the proud but gives grace to the humble (I Pt. 5:5). God is teaching me new & exciting ways that I can be prideful. It isn't being cocky like I thought. It is being focused on myself.

Since I'm a college counselor, all the students go home for the summer, and I have no one to counsel. So I'm blessed to have my summers off from work. I love the summer because we can all use the break. But I found that it wasn't all that exciting. I didn't have much to do. Each day consisted of, "What time shall I work out or go to the pool?" As nice as that sounds, I had no one to worry about but myself which creates a very self-centered mindset. My best days were days that I was doing something for someone else. I found that my mood was down many days, and I couldn't figure out why. Towards the end of the summer, and again this morning, the Lord reminded me that it isn't about me. It is about loving Him & loving others (Mk 12:28-34).

So this morning when I woke up feeling blah and unmotivated, I was again reminded that it is about Him not me. I've been trying to praise the Lord in many different ways this morning, and it began with Psalm 34. I won't write it all out here, but I encourage you to go read it.

I'll leave you with these verses: Ps. 34:1-5
I will bless the LORD at all times; His praise shall continually be in my mouth. My soul will make its boast in the LORD; The humble will hear it and rejoice. O magnify the LORD with me, and let us exalt His name together. I sought the LORD, and He answered me, And delivered me from all my fears. They looked to Him and were radiant, And their faces will never be ashamed.

Roller Coaster Ride

2009-08-07T09:02:00.000-04:00

I must be under some serious attack because this week has been an emotional roller coaster. I fight hard to stay with truth against anxiety, then I'm hit with sadness, depression, happiness, or frustration. It is very tiring to stand firm in what is true especially when the ups and downs come rapidly. No, I'm not bipolar, I promise! It has just been an eventful week.

God ministered to me today in spite of the elephant sitting on my chest this morning. Psalm 19:7 (CEV) "The Law of the LORD is perfect; it gives us new life. His teachings last forever, and they give wisdom to ordinary people." The NASB says "it restores the soul." The NIV says "it revives the soul." And the ever entertaining MSG says "it pulls our lives together." This is what the Word of God does. Why aren't we all reading it like it is our lifeline? It is our lifeline to the Savior! I love the second half of the verse as well. Knowing Scripture makes simple, ordinary people wise . . . even people like me and you.

On my way to work I listened to Chris Tomlin's version of "It is Well with My Soul" the whole way, and the Lord again reminded me, that He is the reason that peace is within my grasp regardless of what is going on around me. Praise Him for what He has done!

Key to Close Relationships

2009-08-06T09:46:00.001-04:00

Today I want to talk about one of the keys to staying close in relationships. Once you see that someone is worthy of trust, you choose to trust and love them. So whether this is a parent, spouse, friend, sibling, whoever . . . you need to choose to trust and love them.

Occasionally, I will say or do something to my husband or vice versa that comes across mean, unloving, or rude. We have learned to trust and love the person regardless, knowing that our intentions to the other person is never to hurt the other one. We always assume that we are loved by the other one because we chose to do that about 5 years ago. I know that Miles loves me, so if I interpret something that he does as hurtful to me, I have to reassure myself of truth: that he loves me. Love has a lot of great characteristics that are somedays very difficult to carry out. It isn't self-seeking or arrogant. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs (I Cor. 13). So I live in the truth that I know Miles loves me.

It is the same way with the Lord. If you have surrendered to his lordship in your life, He tells you that you are His child (Jn. 1:12). He tells you that you are complete in Him (Col.2:10). He tells you that He loves you (Rom. 8:35). He tells you that you are being perfected (Phil. 1:6). He tells you that you are His temple (I Cor. 3:16). He tells you that you can find grace & mercy in time of need (Heb.4:16). Those of you who know me well, know I could harp on this point for a long time, but I'll stop here. Some days it feels like He is out to get us, but love doesn't do that. Love has our best interest at heart. So live in the truth . . . you are loved.

And look . . . when you speak truth in your heart, you may abide with the Lord!

Psalm 15:1-2 O LORD, who may abide in Your tent? Who may dwell on Your holy hill? He who walks with integrity, and works righteousness, and speaks truth in his heart.

P.S. I know that alot of you have experienced alot of pain due to imperfect human beings trying to love in a self-seeking way. Remember that the Lord loves you perfectly, and only He can do that. So trust Him always.

Choosing to Believe Truth

2009-08-05T09:20:00.000-04:00

In the book of Psalms, David is a great example of how to shift perspectives. He expresses his frustration, fear, anger, depression, etc to God, but then he shifts his perspective to the Lord. He reminds himself of what is true in spite of how he feels. I think this is one of the keys to shifting of perspective. We allow our feelings to determine how we are, when your feelings are only a reflection of how you believe. Sure, we all feel down or frustrated or angry or whatever, and we need to acknowledge that. But don't dwell there . . . remind yourself what is true. Here is one (there are many) of David's Psalms that exemplifies what I'm talking about . . .

How long, O LORD ? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and every day have sorrow in my heart? How long will my enemy triumph over me? Look on me and answer, O LORD my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death; my enemy will say, "I have overcome him," and my foes will rejoice when I fall. {Here is where the shift takes place from focusing on his circumstances to focusing on the truth} But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation. I will sing to the LORD, for he has been good to me. (Psalm 13, NIV)

David chose to believe that the Lord loves him, that he is saved by the Lord, & that the Lord has been good to him in spite of the fact that he felt like the Lord had forgotten him. Why? Probably some experience, probably some Scripture. So today . . . what is true? Shift your perspective there.

Shifting my Perspective

2009-08-04T10:10:00.000-04:00

Life is a constant battle of shifting my perspective. Things happen everyday that can destroy me or make me stronger. If my perspective is on the Lord, it makes me stronger. If it is on me, I get depressed, or angry, or frustrated, or sad, or bitter, or whatever emotion is appropriate, you fill in the blank.

I noticed this morning as I was doing my quiet time on my porch enjoying the warmth of the early day, that I was feeling pretty good. I asked myself, "why am I feeling so good this morning?" The realization that I came to is that things are going pretty smoothly (or at least in my perspective). Things aren't always going smoothly. Do I still feel good when they aren't going so smoothly? My husband quoted the elusive "someone" yesterday when he was telling me that God is more interested in our character than our comfort. That rang in my head all day. It is why James says in chapter 1:2-4 . . . "Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don't try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way." (MSG)

So as I grow, I'm able to get to this point more quickly, but I'm far from perfect. I still don't jump for joy when the HVAC unit crashes in the middle of summer or my step-brother dies in a motorcycle accident leaving 3 kids under the age of 16 or once again there are a lot more bills than money to pay them . . . but I can start to see another perspective. What does God want to teach me . . . bkz I'll be stronger for it.